This will be the “interesting”
something that I alluded to at the end of the post here. When I fled that table that was both hot (the
cards) and cold (the temperature), I took seat 8, right next to Milt, in seat
9..
Milt is a regular, plays there a
lot. I see him most evenings I
play. He’s in his early 60’s, recently
divorced. Moved to Vegas after the
divorce. Nice guy, real friendly with
all the dealers and a lot of the other regs.
We always say hi to each other.
He’s one of the guys who is always there earning hours for the
freeroll.
Quick story about Milt. Seems like a pretty smart guy but I saw him
do one of the oddest things I’d ever seen a few months prior. Maybe it ties in with this story. He was sitting at the game and started
talking on his celphone (he wasn’t in the hand). I didn’t pay attention to anything he said,
and then all of sudden, he pulled out his wallet and started reading a credit
card number into the phone, right there at the table, for anyone to
overhear. A couple of the folks at the
table even joked about it. “Let me write
that down.” “Can you repeat that?” Seemed like a pretty dumb thing to do.
Anyway, Milt was on my immediate left
and it was a little crowded because, sitting behind him—between us, really—was a
young woman. I would guess early 20’s,
maybe mid-20’s. Maybe a touch older if
she looks young for her age. This was a
Friday night, and although the right age, she was not dressed for the
club. In fact, she was very nicely
dressed, but more for business. She
could have gone to any office job wearing the outfit she was wearing. White pants, not tight, conservative, modest
top. I dare say she was so
conservatively dressed that, for a woman of her age on a weekend night, she
actually kind of stood out. She was
attractive, very cute, but not at all trying to be sexy.
My first thought was that this was
Milt’s daughter, or, more likely perhaps, his granddaughter. Maybe his niece. What else could she be? She was too young to be his girlfriend.
Milt didn’t introduce us, in fact, he
was so preoccupied with the girl he pretty much ignored me. He was constantly talking to the girl
whenever he was out of a hand. He would
frequently show her his cards. She was
leaning forward, listening, and seemed to be paying attention.
It soon became clear that he was
trying to teach her the fundamentals of poker.
He was explaining the basic rules and etiquette and procedures in a
normal speaking voice, which of course I could hear. But often he would lean back to whisper
something to her. So apparently the
whispering part concerned strategy. He
would do this even when he didn’t have cards, perhaps guessing as to what the
players still alive had or were doing. He
was basically giving her poker lessons right at the table.
How sweet, I thought. Milt taking out his daughter (or other
relative) and showing her the ropes of his favorite hobby. I figured she was probably visiting Vegas for
the weekend, visiting her old man.
Milt asked her a few times if she was
getting the grasp of it. At one point,
he started talking a little bit about the math involved, you know, odds of
hitting a set or hitting your draw, that sort of thing. And then I heard him say, “Are you getting
this? You did say you went to college,
right? So you should be able to pick
this up.”
Ahem.
He wasn’t sure if she had gone to college? Well, I’m pretty sure that if she was his
daughter, or granddaughter, or even his niece, he’d know for sure if she went
to college. I guess there was something
else going on.
But boy, she sure didn’t look like a
hooker, and she sure wasn’t dressed like one.
The other thing he kept talking to her
about was how long they were gonna stay in the poker room. He kept asking her if it was ok if he played
a little longer. She always unhesitantly
said it was fine, stay as long as he wanted.
But he kept asking. “We’ll just
stay two more orbits,” and then he would remind her what an “orbit” was. As it was getting later, he asked if it was
ok to stay another half hour for the midnight drawing, as he had a couple of
tickets in the hopper. She was always
fine with it.
I must admit that part had me
confused. If this lady was hired for
umm, services, why would he have to ask her if it was alright if he played
poker a little longer? My understanding
is that these women are hired by the hour (or the day, or weekend,
whatever). If he wants to pay her to
watch him play poker—and pretend to be learning how to play—why would she
object to that? I assumed the meter had
already started, and all of this was on his nickel.
Of course, I was only
speculating. That he kept asking if it
was ok to stay made my question the exact professional status of this
relationship. At one point, one of the
other regs came by to say hello. He
introduced the young woman to the reg. I
think the reg asked if she was his daughter, and he said no, she was his
“acquaintance.” Note: I think this might
have been when she was out her earshot.
I wasn’t 100% convinced of anything
when she went to the Ladies Room. She
had to be directed to it so obviously wasn’t familiar with the casino. One of Milt’s dealer buddies was dealing and
as soon as she left the room Milt told the dealer that he was driving to LA.
Sunday afternoon, and taking her with him. The dealer asked, “Why don’t you just pick
someone up in L.A.?” And Milt said,
“Why, I’ve got her. Take what you can
get. At my age, I gotta take it when I
can get it.” The dealer laughed and
agreed. “I mean, how else am I gonna get
it? And she’s nice, right?”
I don’t know if it was the dealer or
someone at the table who overheard this, but someone made a reference to Julia
Roberts, and it was obviously a reference to her breakout film, Pretty
Woman. Similar arrangement, I guess.
Milt went on, “I want to die in the
saddle. I don’t want to die at the poker
table, I want to die in bed.” Hmm….now
it was sounding like he hoped this gal would schtupp him to death. My only question: In that case, why are you
still playing poker, why not let the schtupping commence?
Alright, suspicions confirm. It was obvious this was strictly a business arrangement. But certainly this wasn’t the same kind of
working girl that I see out there in casino asking me if I want some
company. Those girls aren’t hiring out
for the weekend. He apparently used an
“escort service.” That’s when I
remembered him reading his credit card into his phone. And I wondered if that was a previous case of
his hiring a rent-a-vagina.
As soon as the drawing was held, he
went to cash out, and I overheard a bit of his conversation with the cashier,
as our table was right next to the podium.
Just as he reached the front, his “date” decided to go to the Ladies
Room again. The female cashier had seen
her and apparently inquired as to who she was after she had left the area. I didn’t hear exactly what he said, but he
apparently made no bones about what the relationship was. And so the cashier said to him, “Oh, a little
f*cky-f*ck, huh?” Milt just laughed and
said, “Yeah.”
Now, I have to admit, I was quite
surprised by this whole scene. No, I
wasn’t surprised that a man had hired a prostitute—albeit a high class one
(higher class than the ones that accost me near the lobby, anyway). I get that.
It isn’t the world’s oldest profession for nothing.
What surprised me was that he was so
open about it, so unashamed. He was
almost boastful. He certainly wasn’t
embarrassed, that’s for sure. As far as
I could tell, the only reason he didn’t make it clear what this arrangement was
when she was around was that he didn’t want to embarrass her. He sure didn’t mind telling folks when she
wasn’t there. And keep in mind, these
weren’t strangers he was telling, these were folks he knew, that he sees on a
daily basis, who know him pretty well. People
he is going to see again when he returns from L.A. after his “f*cky-f*ck.”
I found it surprising. Even if a guy isn’t married, even if he
doesn’t have a significant other, aren’t most guys kind of quiet about hiring
out a sex partner? I mean, unless
they’re Charlie Sheen?
The other thing I thought was weird
was, why have her sit behind him while he’s playing poker? What was the point of that? I get that he can’t
be having sex with her nonstop (especially at his age), but why not have her
show up after he’s done with the poker?
What thrill does he get going through the motions of teaching her how to
play poker? Is he hoping that, in a
addition to having a sex partner, he can turn her into a poker buddy? Like, he wants to play poker with her, than
poke her?
Anyway, that’s the story. They went off into the night and I can only
assume Milt got his money's worth. I
just found his openness about it rather unusual.