"I'm a Damn Handsome Man"

This post will cover two sessions from my last trip, both of which took place on the same Saturday.

I started off late afternoon at the Venetian, where I knew from Twitter that I would find my pal Chris, aka Stump.  I was able to get into the table he was playing immediately, sitting on his immediate left. 

The game was pretty dull. There really weren't any poker hands worth reporting. Oh, I did manage to win a pot with the dreaded pocket Kings.  In fact, I even flopped a set with them.  I had raised to $10 pre and only had a single caller.  I flopped the set with two clubs on the board, I c-bet $15 and didn't get a call.  With any other set, I'd be disappointed with that result.  But with Kings, I was relieved.

We had one amusing dealer.  When he pushed in, he said hello to all the players and with great enthusiasm said, "How's everybody doing today?"  There wasn't much of a response so he said, in kind of a deflated tone, "Oh I see everyone's fine.  Me too, thanks."  Well that guilted a few of us to start answering as to how we were, but he was having none of it.  "No, no.  Too late. Too late."

Chris had been distracted by the waitress who had just brought his drink. He heard the dealer complaining so he said to him, "Sorry, I was paying attention to the most attractive person at the table."   The dealer said, "Well you're right.  She was the most attractive person at the table. And that's saying a lot.  Because I am a damn handsome man."

We all had a good laugh at that.

Then he noticed one of the players at the table was named "Avery."  He saw that his last initial was not "G", which he thought was too bad.  He said to the guy, "It's a shame you're name's not Avery Goodman....because then it would be, 'a very good man'."  Chris said, "Yeah, like 'Saul Goodman—'s all good, man." (that only makes sense if you watch "Better Call Saul")

Somehow that got the guy on a riff where he was conceiving of a crime novel right there at the table. He was imagining a plot where there are two twin brothers, who are really bad guys but they never get caught because no one knows they're really twins and they always have alibi.

Bookmark this post and come back in a couple of years and see if that's the plot of a New York Times thriller.

After a couple of hours, the game got even duller and I wasn't getting any cards so I said good-bye to Chris and headed to MGM for dinner and more poker. 

My very first hand at MGM, I looked down at pocket Queens.  A guy had raised to $12 and another guy called.  First hand at the table, not knowing any of the players, I just called.  It ended up being four-ways to the flop.  The flop was Jack-high, two diamonds.  The preflop raiser checked, but the next guy bet $20.  I called and we were heads up.  The turn was a King and he bet $35 and I called.  There was a third diamond on the river and this time he checked.  I checked behind.  He showed pocket 10's.  It was a nice pot.

Sometime later, I was in the small blind with Ace-5 off and I completed.  Six of us saw a flop of Ace-9-6. I checked and called a $10 bet and it was now 4-way.  A 4 hit the turn and I checked.  Same guy bet $15 and I called and we were heads up.  River was a deuce. I checked/called another $15 and he showed only Ace-3.  My 5 played, just barely. 

Much later, I had pocket Jacks.  There were a number of limpers and so I made it $14.  Three players called.  The flop was Jack-high, which was nice, but there were two diamonds.  I bet $40.  Only one player called.  The turn was a brick and I put out $100 which looked like about what he had left.  It turned out he was a few bucks short of that but he called.  The King of hearts hit the river which obviously didn't help him because he didn't show when he saw my set and just left the game.

I didn't get another hand to play for the next couple of orbits.  I noticed I was getting real tired and it was getting a bit late anyway, so I racked up and cashed out up $305 for the session.  It certainly wasn't an awesome result but it was the best I'd done in awhile so I even took a pic of my stack and tweeted it out with the caption: "Not my best chip porn but I'll take it."

And indeed I did. 

Below is better "chip porn."