Tuesday, April 21, 2015

The Girl With the Magic Cleavage

As regular regulars have figured out, usually when I’m in Vegas on a Saturday, I enjoy playing a tournament.  It’s most likely the Binion’s $140 deepstack.  If not that, the Aria $125 is also a great option.

Before I got to Vegas for the first weekend of March Madness, I realized that I was going to be disappointed that first Saturday. As part of my day job with PokerAtlas,  I knew that neither Binion’s nor Aria were going to run their regular tournaments.  Binion’s had their Spring Classic going on, and on that Saturday they were running a $300+ event for a WSOP seat.  Too rich for my blood.  And Aria was in the middle of their “Race for the Clover” event, so that tournament too was over $300.  I just wanted a deepstack tournament with a $125-$150 buyin as usual. 

But I was out of luck.  One option was to play cash all day.  Not a bad idea for a Saturday filled with tourists coming into town to bet about a zillion college basketball games.  But I feared if my luck wasn’t good I might need too big a bankroll to last all day playing cash.  I kind of wanted a tournament to take up some time.  The best idea I came up was the $65 tournament at Treasure Island.  It had a $1K guarantee (since reduced to $750) and is basically the same tournament I played a few years back at the “Grumpament” (see here).

They had a great turnout this day.  Over 70 players, filling 6 tables. There was one cash game going on and the room only has 7 tables, so the room was max capacity.  It would have been a nice tournament to win—first place was over $1,500.  And the players at my table were really bad.  I should have crushed it.  But I didn’t.

The bad players were almost all calling stations.  They called you down with anything and would of course sometimes hit.  Since there were multiple players calling down their weak draws, somebody almost always hit something.  I need to learn how to play in games like that.  It seemed to me my best option was to wait to get a hand and then get max value for it.  Trouble is, I never made a hand.  So, not making any hands against these calling stations meant I busted out in the fourth level, barely after the first break.   

While I was approaching the TI parking lot, I noticed the Wynn across the diagonally across the street.  It had been awhile since I played there so I put the idea in the back of my mind of maybe walking over there after I was done at TI.  So when I busted so early, that’s what I did.

At Wynn, I encountered “The Girl With the Magic Cleavage.”  This gal comes to the table and that caught my interest, always nice to see a female join our heretofore strictly male table.  She was cute, dressed very conservatively at first glance, and actually seemed to be wearing a lot of clothing, perhaps hiding the fact that she might have been a pound or two overweight.  As she was getting settled in her seat I turned away to play a hand.  When I looked back over to her, suddenly cleavage had magically appeared.  I swear it wasn’t there when she first sat down.  Hmm…..Then as it turned out, based on the first few hands, it did indeed seem like the girl had magical powers…whether it emanated from her cleavage, I can’t be sure.

As she was getting settled in, the dealer asked if she had a player’s card.  She said she didn’t and then explained, “I just got to town.  First time in Vegas.”  A few of us welcomed her and then she added, “First time playing poker.”  Really? That would be interesting.  Did she mean first time playing poker ever or did she mean first time playing in a casino?

Well, it didn’t take long to get more information.  The dealer asked her if she was ready to get dealt a hand.  She asked, “Do I have to post?”

Ok, that put the lie to her claim that she’d never played poker before.  You must have played a poker –in a casino, no less—to even know to ask that question.  To even know what it means to post.  So I knew I had to keep an eye on her.  Truth be told, she never acted like she didn’t know what she was doing.

In fact, the very first hand she was dealt, she raised.  I don’t recall much of the action but she won a smallish pot at showdown and showed Ace-Jack for the win.

The next hand she raised again, to $9.  When it got to me, I looked down at pocket Jacks.  I certainly hadn’t figured out anything about magic cleavage girl, so I just called.  It folded to the table’s resident Crazian, who was one of the blinds.  He made it $40.  Now it was getting interesting.

I was eager to see how magic cleavage girl would respond.  If she had another hand like Ace-Jack, would she call a three-bet?  Well, she started counting chips and I realized she was going to re-raise.  She settled on $87 (total).

I had been card dead and those Jacks had looked pretty nice when I opened them but they didn’t look so good now so I folded without hesitation.  But the Crazian called and it was heads up.

The flop was low, and almost immediately, the Crazian announced “all-in.”  The girl had bought in for $200 and the Crazian had her well covered.  She didn’t waste any time calling.  He showed pocket 9’s.  She flipped over a couple of Aces.  The board bricked out and she had gotten a nice double up, second hand of the session.  How lucky for her….not only getting those Aces but getting them against a guy who would double her up with only an unimproved pair of 9’s.

Less than an orbit later, she raised again, had a couple of callers.  The flop was 8-3-3 and it was checked around.  A 7 came out on the turn, she bet and another guy shoved.  She snap-called.  She had the guy covered, but not by that much.  She showed pocket 8’s.  He showed pocket 7’s.  Another near double up.

It was quite a run for her.  I left soon thereafter so I have no idea how she ended up.  But if it really was her first time in Vegas, it was quite a welcome.

There’s nothing really to say about the lousy session I had there at the Wynn.  The session I had later at Caesars (this was the same night I checked out the new Slut Parade, see here) had only one interesting hand, my last one.  Before I get to that, I’ll talk about the guy playing scared.  There was a guy there who, when I had arrived to the table, had about $1,200-$1,300 in front of him.  I was only there a few minutes when I heard him ask the dealer, “I can’t take any of this off the table, can I?”  Of course, the dealer told him he could only take money of the table if he left the game.  He stayed, but the big stack obviously affected his play.  I was sure that this guy was just having the best run of his life and had never played so deep before.

This was the session that featured the aggro Brit who button straddled face up (see here).  I mentioned the Brit’s buddy who was also an aggro.  That guy became the nemesis of the guy who was nervous playing the $1,200 stack.  Soon after the aggro got there, the nervous guy bet $100 on a flop of 10-9-8, two clubs.  The aggro shoved for over $500.  The nervous guy tanked forever.  He had the dealer count the bet.  Finally he folded.  The aggro showed Ace-Queen, neither of which was a club.  In other words, he had air.  The nervous guy said he folded a set.  The nervous guy laughed awkwardly but I’m sure it was killing him. 

There was another time he folded to the same guy’s shove on the river.  The board had a King & Queen on it and also a possible straight.  He took forever to fold his pocket 10’s face up.  The aggro showed his pocket 4’s.  I’m pretty sure there was one more hand when the nervous guy folded to this same guy’s all-in bluff.

He ended up losing about 1/3 of his big stack, mostly by making his own (bad) bluffs that were called (some of them by yours truly).  But he wasn’t bluffing all in.

You know, one of the nice things about the Caesars poker room is the location.  There’s easily half a dozen other poker rooms within walking distance.  Once the guy got to the point of asking if he could take money off the table, he should have cashed out and gotten into another game with a normal buy-in in one of those other rooms.

My last hand, I was on my second buy-in (don’t ask) and I had about $190 left and was ready to call it a night, down to what I promised myself would be my last orbit.  I limped in with Ace-5 of clubs.  One guy made it $10, another guy made it $20 and another guy called the $20.  I was nearly done so I decided to call the $20.  All told, five of us saw the flop. 

It came down 7-3-2.  The 7 was red, the other two cards were both clubs.  I had the nut flush draw, the gut-shot straight draw and the steel wheel draw.  One guy bet $30, another guy called that, the big stack made it $90, the next guy called that.  I called.  The guy who bet $30 folded.  The guy who called the $30 shoved for about $160, the big stack shoved and of course I shoved too.  It was a monster pot.

The turn was a red 9.  The river was black 10, but a spade, not a club.  I had Ace high.  Damn.  The guy who called $30, then shoved had flopped a set of 7’s.  The big stack showed pocket 9’s.  Note, he had gone all in on the flop before he had a set.  He had also been the preflop three-bettor.  I didn’t see if the short-stack showed his hand.  I just left, totally defeated.

Tough day of poker when almost all of my blogging material came from hands I wasn’t in.


  1. The flop was low, and almost immediately, the Crazian announced “all-in.” The girl had bought in for $200 and the Crazian had him well covered. -----whose him?

    1. It was a typo, I meant "her" and I've corrected it.

      Once again, I didn't get the email notice that you had commented so I just noticed this when I woke up this morning. Sorry for not approving this sooner, you were actually the first to notice this. Good catch.

  2. "the Crazian had him well covered" small gender mistake, Rob.

    1. Thanks, Anony....corrected. You would have thought I would have noticed the cleavage.

  3. Replies
    1. Thanks.....still waiting for Anger's grade.

  4. the sequel the girl with the magical camel toe. solid A on pic

    1. Hmm...magical camel toe. Interesting concept.