Wednesday, October 18, 2017

"I Hate Slow-Rollers!"

It was getting near the end of my Vegas trip, the second Friday night I was there (and leaving Monday).  So I had a nice dinner with Lightning and then a poker session with him and VegasDWP.

This was the night after our big group dinner at Hugo's, you know the one where we met Naked Girl completely dressed.  I mean Naked Girl was completely dressed.  Wait, that's still ambiguous.  We were all completely dressed.  Anyway, Lightning had been playing all afternoon at the Mirage so I meet him there and we ate at the burger place there, LVB Burger.  Actually the full name is "LVB Burgers and Bar" so I dunno if "LVB" stands for Las Vegas Burgers (which would be redundant—Las Vegas Burgers Burgers and Bar?—or maybe Las Vegas Boulevard).

Neither of us had ever eaten there before.  We were looking for a cheap meal and it was only cheap because Lightning had enough Mirage poker comps to pay for it.  Because honestly, $15.50 for a burger is not even remotely cheap.  And that's not even a cheeseburger, folks, just a plain hamburger. And at that, it came with nothing, no fries, no drink.  Just the burger.  If we wanted to add fries and a drink they'd give us the meal deal for another $7.50.  Like I've been saying, Vegas ain't what it used to be.  But at least they didn't charge extra for the pickles, onions or ketchup.

I have to say that the burger was really good though.  Not $15.50 good, but good.  I guess I might go there again if I ever build up my comp balance at Mirage to $15.50.  Although I usually use my Mirage comps for a pastrami sandwich at the Carnegie Deli, which is right across the way from the burger joint.

Lightning and I had a nice dinner re-hashing the surprise appearance of Naked Girl and Rich Guy the night before.  Then we headed over to the Wynn for some of that pokerz.  By the way, Wynn is the latest casino to start charging for parking.  However, I found out that they will validate the parking ticket for poker players (two hours of play or more).

We got there a few minutes before VegasDWP arrived and although Lightning and I were at the same table to begin with, DWP had to go to a different game and wait for a table transfer.  But eventually we all ended up not only at the same game but all next to each other.  Lightning was on my right and DWP was on my left.

The game at Wynn is 1/3 so I bought in for $300.  The table was a little less aggro than I'm used to at the Wynn.  But there were still some fireworks.  One of the players was a heavy-set guy who said he spends about half his time in Vegas and half his time on the East Coast—New Jersey, if memory serves.  And we were just settling into the table when he started telling the story of how he really, really hates slow-rollers. 

How much does he hate them?  Well, he once got banned from a casino for 24-hours (I think it was Foxwoods) for throwing a chip-rack at another player for slow-rolling.  Seriously.  But that's not even the worst of it.  He said the guy who he threw the chip-rack at wasn't even slow-rolling him!  He was slow-rolling some other player.  But he got so mad he threw the rack at him.  He said that the guy had been warned a couple of times about slow-rolling, that's why he got so pissed. they warn you for slow-rolling?  I've never seen it.  Now that I'm thinking about it, if the guy was warned, it must have been this guy, the guy we were playing with at the Wynn, who did the warning.  Unless the slow-roller was doing it in such a way so that it was obvious taunting of the other player. I dunno.  But this fat guy made it clear he really hated slow-rolling, that's for sure.

So a few hours into the session, this happened.  There was a nice, white-haired older woman at the table.  She'd buy in for $100 any time she busted.  She had obviously played a lot of poker over a lot of years.  And in this particular hand, she went all-in for less than $100.  I think it was on the flop.  The fat guy, who had well over $500, called.  It was heads up, and he flipped over his hand.  I believe it was top pair, top kicker.  The lady said and did nothing.  The dealer put out the last two cards which didn't help the guy's hand at all.  After the river was dealt, she turned over her hand, a set of 8's to take the pot.

That totally set the guy off. He was livid.  "You've played poker for a long time.  You know not to slow-roll."

The lady said, "What are you talking about?  I didn't slow-roll."  She had turned over her hand as soon as the dealer finished dealing the board.  What the guy was referring to was her not tabling her hand when he showed his top pair hand, that she was ahead of.

The guy said, "Yes you did.  I showed my hand right away, I had my chips pushed forward in the pot, why slow-roll me like that?"

"I can do whatever I want.  I didn't slow-roll you."

"Yes you did.  You slow-rolled me.  You should have showed your hand as soon as I showed mine."

"I don't care what you think.  I don't give a shit."  She said something about how she's "only been playing poker for 50 years."

"I told you I hate slow-rolling."  In fact, he sure had.  And the lady was at the table before we were all there, so she surely was there for his story about getting banned for throwing a rack.

To be honest, I thought it got nasty enough between them for the dealer to say something, but he didn't.  Actually, I was kind of waiting for him to call the floor.

I wonder how you feel about this.  To me, she was not slow-rolling.  It was a cash game, not a tournament.  She was not required to show her hand before it was finished being dealt.  It is strictly player optional.  Some players do it (like the fat guy), others refrain.  Personally, I usually wait and only show if the other player does it first.  Sometimes I don't even do it then if I feel that maybe I made a bad play.

And I've heard many a player say, when asked to show early, "No, it's bad luck."  I can see that.  Poker players are nothing if not superstitious.  She was the overwhelming favorite to win the hand at that point, but she could have lost.  OK, it was the longest of long shots, but if she's played poker for fifty years, she may have a story about just such a horrific bad beat like that in her memory bank.

Anyway, things quieted down, but there was another similar incident.  This time the guy who hated to be slow-rolled was in a hand with an older gentleman, who had also been at the table the whole time.  But he may have had a language problem, not sure.  He said very little.  I think the old guy called the guy's shove, verbally, and the cranky guy kept insisting that he push his chips forward.  "Put your chips in the pot. Are you all-in?"  The old guy said, "All-in."  But the other guy was pissed that he hadn't pushed his chips forward. He asked the dealer repeatedly if the older guy was all in and he was told he was.  But he was upset he hadn't pushed his chips forward.  Again, the cranky guy lost the hand, and he was pissed that guy had slow-rolled him.  I don't recall if he had actually waited long to show his hand (I think, but I'm not sure, that the betting action had taken place on the river this time), he was more upset about him not pushing his chips in front of him.  "Again?  I'm being slow-rolled again?"  This was a little less contentious than the previous time.

In his defense....well, he didn't throw a chip-rack at anyone.

As for the poker itself, by far my best hand came very early in the session.  It was early in the first orbit I played and I was the big blind.  I had Queen-Jack of hearts and I called $12 (it was sooooted!).  It was 3-ways.  The flop was rather sweet: 10-9-8, two spades.  Because I was so new to the table and didn't have a clue how anyone played, and because there were two spades on the board, I donked out $20.  The preflop raiser made it $80.  He had about $200 (including the $80 bet) and I started the hand with my original $300 buy-in.  I tanked for a bit and tried to come up with a raise that wasn't a shove and couldn't.  I suppose I could have made it $150 but I figured if he'd call that he'd call the rest of his stack.  So I shoved. 

He tanked for a bit and finally called.  He had pocket Aces.  My straight held and I suddenly had about $500 in front of me.

Later I had Aces myself.  There was a limp, a raise to $20, a call of the $20.  I made it $80 and took it without a call.

With the dreaded pocket Kings I opened to $15 and it was four-ways, including DWP.  The flop was Queen-Queen-x, which I didn't like very much.  I did make the c-bet of $30 but DWP called as did the older lady I've already told you about.  The turn was a blank and I was pretty sure there was at least one Queen out there.  I checked.  DWP bet $40 and the lady called.  I folded.  I don't remember the further betting action but DWP took the pot with Queen-Jack.  I think the lady only had pocket 8's, unimproved.  Apparently you can play poker for fifty years without being very good at it.

I got Kings again and opened to $12, two callers.  The flop was Queen-hi which was much better than two Queens.  I bet $30 and didn't get a call.

I didn't lose any big pots, just smallish pots. After 3-1/2 hours, we left and I had a $125 profit for the session.


  1. In your situation, I would've intentionally slow-rolled Lightning or DWP in a small pot (telling them beforehand of the plan) just to get that imbecile riled up.

    1. Wow, what a great suggestion, Mr. S. I never would have thought of that myself. Thanks.

    2. Rob might not remember (although he kept excellent notes on this story) that after the older guy, who seemed to not understand English very well, was accused of the slow roll, I tried to intercede, defending him genttly and trying to lighten the mood at the time. The big guy would hear none of it and started to give me crap. At that point I got up from the table and used the nearby restroom to get out of the situation. When I returned, the big guy had settled down a little. Also, the elderly woman must have had a field day listening to Rob, David and I discussing Naked Girl. This was definitely a fun night at Wynn/Encore!

    3. Thanks for the extra color that I left out. I had totally forgotten about your attempt to lighten the mood by the next day, but now that you mention it, I do have a vague recollection of it. The guy was some jerk.

      Also, now that I think of it, it did occur to me that our conversation about Naked Girl might be a little offputting for the woman. But she didn't react at all, and I kind of convinced myself that she didn't hear us. I do wonder, tho....

  2. Naked Girl was back in town recently ... unfortunately, I did not get to see her. Either naked, or clothed..🤔

  3. Rob, with that picture of the girl in rollerskates, are you slow-rolling Us?