Sunday, September 23, 2012

How Much Cleavage Is Appropriate?

Well, the question answers itself, doesn’t it?  Is it even possible for any cleavage to be inappropriate?  Or for there to me too much of it?  It’s like being too rich, or too lucky, or two happy.  So the answer is simply, all cleavage is appropriate.

Still, not long ago, someone Googled that very question and it took them to this very blog.  I am honored that Google considers me an expert on cleavage.  And on the appropriateness of it.  I mean, if the biggest internet search engine in the world considers me an expert on cleavage, who am I to argue?

So ladies, you can now come to me with all your cleavage questions.  So says Google.
Definitely NOT Inappropriate
(BTW, the post that was referenced was this one.  They were actually doing an image search.  Take a look at the post and you’ll see why)

One of the things that is fun about doing a blog is seeing what people Googled (or Yahoo’d, or Bing’ed) that landed them on your blog.  I did a very long post (shocking, I know) back in May about this once already, see here.  And in fact, recently, my pals grrouchie and Josie also did posts about the very same thing, see here and here.  I keep getting amused by the searches, I’ve considered doing sort of a running page just listing the funny search terms, and maybe someday I will. (NOTE:  I have now set up that running page of search terms, and you can find it here.)

Sometimes, it’s just the weird things people search for that are funny.  I’m too lazy to look, but there must be places on the web you can go just to see funny searches.  But some of the things that people search for that somehow gets them here is also something that tickles me.

And by the way, I hadn’t planned this a “special event” post, but I just noticed that my blog just passed its first birthday.  Yeah, the first post hit the web on September 20, 2011.  Actually I had four posts up in the first two days (just to prove to myself that I could write more than a paragraph or two—I guess I didn’t really have to worry about that).

The other most amusing search term recently was, “red sox pussy hair.”

WTF?

I mean, seriously, WTF?

If someone can explain to me what the hell they were really looking for, I’d appreciate it.  I don’t see the connect between the Red Sox and well, you know.  Maybe it was a typo and the meant to leave the “sox” out of it?  Auto fill?  Does Google automatically put “sox” after “red”?  Josie would like that.

As to how that got them here, I have no freakin’ clue.  I’m pretty sure I’ve never mentioned the Red Sox on the blog, because there’s really not much I care less about than them.  But maybe in some comments?  I guess maybe.  But the closest thing I came to talking about hair down there was in this post here and I didn’t use that term.  Unfortunately, I’m not sure what post that got them to, because I didn’t make a note of it (also, sometimes I can’t figure it out anyway).

But I was able to determine that the searcher was from Saskatchewan, Canada.  Why anyone in Canada even cares about the Red Sox is beyond me.  But perhaps this whole search is a Canadian thing.  Maybe I just don't get it because of the vast cultural differences between our two countries.  Or perhaps, "red sox pussy hair" is actually Canadian for "great poker blog."

Now here’s one I know exactly how they found me:  how big are the dicks at the palomino male dancers fully naked?”  It seems that question led them to this post.  Of course, in that post, I never made any mention of the size of the dancer who, shall we say, exposed himself, or his other profession, anyway, at the poker table.  It never came up (so-to-speak).  But I’m guessing the Midwest housewife of the title was dying to find out.  And also, in that post, I never used the word “dick.”  But there was enough in that phrase to land them here.

By the way, that post recently got a sudden burst in popularity.  It seems that a website/forum that is dedicated to interracial sex put a link to it not long ago.  A guy apparently found my post because he was looking for a club where he could take his (white) wife to where she could interact with naked black guys!  His research led him to my post, even though I never mentioned the ethnicity of anyone in the story.  Anyway, after he linked my post in their forum, I got almost 100 new hits on that old post.  Thank you for your um, interesting, predilections, sir!

How about “big Russian breasts”?  Him, I don’t think I’ve ever discussed the country or origins of breasts on this sight.  I do have a surprising number of readers from Russia, however.

“Motorboating girls”  That’s too easy.  See here.

“cleavage poker tournament”  No idea what that is, but I’m in favor of it.  Hmm….perhaps starting stacks are determined by how much cleavage is exposed?

“biggest tits in Hollywood”  Not sure why this got them here.  It’s an interesting topic, just not one I’ve addressed here. 

“bears playing poker”  That’s a “huh’?  I mean, everyone knows about the dogs playing poker, but bears?  I’ve surely never discussed bears here.  Do they mean the Chicago Bears?  Do bears play poker in the woods?

“nude gigolos en las vegas”  Hmm….again, not a topic I’ve ever discussed, or ever will.

“OKAY TITS”  Why does he only want to see tits that are just ok?  That’s setting the bar low, isn’t it?  If you’re looking for tits on the internet, don’t you want them to be better than just OK?

“colleg tits”  Geez, man, if you want a college girl, you’re gonna have to learn how to spell!

“jennifer tilly naked” and “jennifer tilly nude”  Miss Tilly has been discussed on the blog, but never in that condition.  Those searchers who were looking for pics of her without clothes must have been disappointed when they got here, although I understand that pictures of her in that state do exist.  Shocking, I know. 

“hottest female poker players”  No doubt they were brought here because of all the times I’ve talked about Prudence. 

And finally,


“poker tournaments las vegas”  Now how in the world did that lead anyone here?  Go figure.

Again, if you like the search terms, check out the running thread here.

8 comments:

  1. Yep it's official people are weird :)

    There is a site that records google searches (seolol.net). Kinda weird and wonderful searches such as "why does my goats milk taste so goaty?"

    Anyway enough of that I have more important things to be doing, such as looking for those Jennifer Tilly photos :P

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    1. Thanks iNco, that's a great site, just looked at it. You can also follow it on twitter, which I will do.

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  2. There were a bunch of poker bloggers from the UK who had a thing going to rank themselves for 'hairy gymnast' a few years ago... alas the last remenants are now on page 3!

    Pretty sure that was kicked off by some random keyword in someones referral list.

    Great blog!
    Mark

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    1. Thanks, Mark. "hairy gymnast", huh? That's very interesting.

      I have to admit I'd much rather be known as a cleavage expert than for having an interest in hairy gymnasts!

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  3. Just to add instead of doing my own post on it...
    This is what I have seen recently.

    Huge tits beer pizza football
    Midget stripper
    Shit Stain

    Roofies is still by far the most searched for on my site followed by Boobies and Titty

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    1. Midget Stripper, huh? Must make you proud....

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  4. For better or WORSE, you are back.

    Dress in a dirndl for more traffic. For a while that topped my searches. Now I am the Artie Johnson "Very Interesting but Stupid" goto site. That one I may have backdoored from discussing your blog.

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    1. I'm glad that I am "back" on your RSS feed, if that's what was wrong. Thanks again for letting me know. I guess it was that font I started using, something with some of the RSS feeds just didn't like it. Computers are so damn fussy.

      I have to admit that I'm not really sure what the rest of your comment means, Ken. Sorry. I did Google "Drindl" and that type of dress is nor really similar to what the gal in the pic on this post is wearing. Are you saying if I put that in a post it would get me hits? And also, I googled the Arte Johnson quote and didn't get your blog, at least on the fist few pages. So what do you mean?

      BTW, you and I are old enough to remember seeing Arte Johnson do that line for the very first time on Laugh-in. Wow.

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