Thursday, May 2, 2013

Lying, Sleazy Sports Handicappers—The Follow Up

Remember this post here, about the lying, sleazy sports handicapper I called for fun to get a “sure thing” on an NFL playoff game back in January?  Sure you do.  I know my loyal readers have memorized everyone of my past blog posts.

But in case you don’t remember, and you’re too lazy to click on the link above (which will be, oh, I’d guess 99.5% of you), I’ll remind you.  I heard an infomercial with some guy who sells sports betting tips for a living.  Called the number, which they promised on the radio a million times would get me a recorded announcement telling me who would win an NFL playoff game.  Instead I got a human being who begged me to give him $100 to subscribe to the service.
I hung on up the guy, but before I lost my patience I had to give him first name—I gave him a phony one—and a phone number.  I gave him a phony number, but as I mentioned in the post, the service no doubt had my cell phone number thanks to caller ID.
So I’ve been meaning to mention here that in fact, I have heard back from these sleazeballs numerous times since I called them.  I’ve got numerous phone calls trying to entice me with “sure thing” picks—first NFL, then college hoops, then NBA.  Sometimes the calls were robo-calls, but mostly it was a live person.  They never told me the pick, just that they had a sure winner and was I interested?  I kept telling these guys I was not interested, and not to call me back, etc.  I’d say it happened at least half a dozen times since mid-January. I think the last time I was pretty adamant that I would never do business with them and that if they kept harassing me, I would report them to the “authorities”—whoever that was.  It’s been at least 6 weeks since I got one of these calls.
I also got a few text messages from them too.
So, yesterday, in the morning, I get a totally unidentified text that said the following:  “We’re documented #1 in the NBA at 119-36-3 (7-1 in the playoffs)  OKC is a giant play tonight.  They’ll crush Houston and cover easily.  VERY BIG MOVE ON OKC.”
At first I was annoyed, but then I thought, wow, this is what the promised on the radio show three months ago, a totally free pick.  I didn’t have to call or respond in anyway, or subscribe.  They just sent me their “lock” pick gratis.  No charge.  Our gift to you.
So apparently they finally got so desperate for my business they were finally willing to live up to their original promise from long ago, a totally free pick.
There’s just one problem.  Did you happen to catch the game last night?  I did.  Heh heh.  Had it on while I was working and watched the end of it over a late dinner.  OKC did not exactly cover the spread easily. Or even with difficulty.  They didn’t cover the spread at all. In fact they lost outright by 7 points.  I checked the sports book after the game and the Thunder were favored by 9 points.  That’s the opposite of “covering the spread easily.”
Every single person who got a text like the one I got and bet it based on that would have lost money.
I guess they won’t be getting any subscribers as a result of that text blast I got.  What a pity.
So not only are they sleazy liars, but they’re incompetent at what they do.
OK, I know that’s unfair.  No sports handicapper could be right 100% of the time.  I get that.
But the fact that they could be so wrong on a “sure thing” that they used to prove to potential subscribers how awesome they are….well, that totally amuses me.
So my thanks go out to the Houston Rockets for the smile on my face.


  1. I'll continue to give you bad picks for free... ;)

    1. I know I can always count on you, Coach.

  2. But Rob, what about the 100 peeps who got the "free" lock and it was Houston?.....if 50% of those who went with Houston, pay the $100 you get $5,000 for just two messages sent out. And no you never have to be right doing those kind of "pickings".

    1. Thanks, Norm. That exact scam was discussed in the comments on the original post. So yeah, it's entirely possible that some people got the exact same text except that Houston was a lock to cover.

  3. I was about to make the same comment Norm did. The term sleazeballs is understating what they really are.

    1. True, MOJO, but this is a family blog.


    2. I used to play horse's at Santa Anita and I became friends with bartender in Club House. He would tell me he had a sure thing in the fourth race. Then he would tell someone else he a sure thing but give him a different horse. He would say put ten dollars on the nose for me. He would just give out different names until one of them would hit. He could not lose. He was betting with other peoples money.

    3. Great story edh, thanks.

  4. I'd fold the Kings preflop here Rob.

    1st you have an uncanny relationship with them and are probably a historical loser overall with KK (specifically two red kings, but all kings in general) and since you are in early position why in the bloody Hatche E Double Hockey Sticks would you do anything but limp.
    You want a raiser and a bunch of calls so that you can just push and not have to worry about playing post flop and hopefully chase away the TBC's of the world who will get all their chips in with AK knowing that their 3 out is coming (specifically against you).

    2nd, there is no 2nd.

    1. Umm,thanks, grrouchie. I'm trying to figure out what post this comment was really meant for since the one you left it was a totally non-poker post, no KK involved.

      Was much beer consumed tonite?