It was back
to Binions for me, the weekend 2PM Deepstack.
I had arrived in town the Friday of the prior weekend so I could make it
time for their “Super Saturday” $160 tourn, which didn’t go so well. So now I was back for just their regular $125
tournament.
Probably
because of the big turnout the week before, the $25K guarantee tournament, this
one was not that well attended, and in fact, they had to make an overlay to
make their $10K guarantee. The
delightful Heather decided to play rather
than deal and we chatted a bit before the tournament started. She had dealt to me the previous night at
MGM, and this took place the first or second weekend the popular nightclub had
opened, as discussed in The Slut Parade
post. She asked me what time I had left, because she wanted to know if I was
there when they started taking girls out of the clubs on stretchers. Actually, I had missed that. I asked if she knew what happened to
them. She could only speculate that
maybe they had had too much too drink.
Hopefully it wasn’t anything stronger (or less legal) than alcohol.
But I offered
another possible explanation. “Maybe
some of them broke their ankles, falling off their shoes?” As I had mentioned, a lot of the girls seemed
to have trouble walking in their heels.
Many wobbled (even before they had started drinking) and many fell off
them or fell over. As the night wore on,
it was common to see more and more of them carry their shoes and walk through
the casino barefoot. Some even had two
pair of shoes with them, so they could walk through the casino in flats.
Through the
course of the tournament I encountered two blogger look-alikes. There was this guy that looked like an older
version of Poker Grump. Not quite old enough
to be Grump’s father, but close. This is
a guy I’ve seen before, for sure at this tournament and perhaps at other venues
around town.
Then there
was a Lightning look-alike. What’s
weird about that is that Alaskagal had
earlier in the week tweeted about dealing to a guy who looked like
Lightning. When I tweeted about this, it
was somehow determined that my Lightning look-alike wasn’t the same Lightning
look-alike that AG had seen. Can you
imagine there being three people in the world who look like Lightning? Would a just god play such a cruel trick on
us? Just asking.
There was one
other person in the tournament I thought I recognized, a woman who I was at the
same table with off and on as they kept breaking tables and moving us around to
balance things. She had a familiar face,
but I couldn’t place her at first. It
was driving me crazy, and slowly, slowly, it started dawning on me. Not only did I know her, but I was quite
familiar with her cleavage. And where had
I seen her cleavage before? I know! I
know!
On this very
blog, that’s where.
Yeah, I was
becoming convinced that the lady in question was Judy,
the woman in the center of the picture on the post here. Of the three ladies in that picture, Judy was
the one I hadn’t met before. So basically,
my introduction to her pretty much consisted of her pulling down her top for me
and demanding that I take a picture of her that way.
Sigh. If only
more women would introduce themselves to me like that.
Truth be
told, it really wasn’t Judy’s idea to pose for that picture. I’m not sure she was really clear on what was
going on that day. It was all her pal
Jeanne’s idea, based on how I met Jeanne (see here),
which btw was at this very same Binions tournament over a year ago.
If it is
Jeanne’s belief that all of her girlfriends must reveal their breasts to me
when she introduces us, I can only hope that she introduces me to more of her
girlfriends.
But I was in
a quandary as to how to ask Judy—if this was indeed Judy—if we had met before
and if she was indeed one of the stars of a previous blog post of mine. I should point out that Judy was revealing no
cleavage on this day so I actually had to recognize her from her face—proving
that yes, I can do that! Judy did not
seem to recognize me. Maybe she did and
felt it was just too awkward to ask a guy, “Say didn’t you take a picture of me
with my shirt pulled down once and post it on the internet?”
Because if she’s wrong, the obvious comeback is, “No, but would you like
me too?” As I said….awkward.
From my point
of view, asking a woman if I’ve taken a picture of her like that—and posted it
for the entire internet to see—is kinda awkward too. Or, “Haven’t I
photographed your breasts?” just seems like the worst introductory line in the
history of mankind.
Then too,
although we were at the same table on-and-off throughout the tourney, I was
never sitting next to her so I could talk to her discreetly. And you all know that I am the king of
discretion. Even when it finally dawned
on me that I could just say, “Aren’t you Judy, Jeanne’s friend?” and not even
mention the photograph, it seemed to me
that I would have to bring up my blog, or perhaps she would, and I still am not
sure to handle my blog at a poker table.
A big part of me doesn’t want it known to the people I’m playing with
that I have a blog and/or am a columnist for a poker mag. I feel they will think I’m a better player
than I am and I think it’s usually to my advantage that people think I’m not a
good player. Lord knows, I give plenty
of evidence to that with my play.
I really
shouldn’t be afraid to mention it myself.
Other people have outted me right at the poker table, as both a blogger
and a poker columnist. And you know
what, 99% of the people who hear this don’t give a rat’s ass about it. The most I get is, “You write a blog?” And when I say yes, they look interested for
all of 1/10th of a second and then don’t say another word about it.
Anyway, I’ll
get back to Judy, but I should probably start talking about the tournament,
since this is, first and foremost, a serious poker blog.
The
tournament started and directly to my right was a very friendly guy, who seemed
like a local regular but was actually visiting from Canada. He looked to me like he might have been an
Indian. Not an Indian from India but
a….well, I guess I should call him a native American but how can I do that if
he’s from Canada, eh? Anyway, he had a
deep, booming voice and was just about the nicest guy in the world. Funny, too.
Early in the
tournament, he noticed me writing notes and said, “Hey, no notes. That’s against the PGA rules!”
I replied,
“The PGA
rules? Ok, I won’t take notes when I
play golf.”
I badly
misplayed an early hand and won chips only because my opponent misplayed it
even more. In the small blind it folded
to me. I had Queen-Jack off so I just
limped, a terrible move, I know. I
definitely should have raised. The big
blind, an elderly gentleman, just checked behind me. Flop was Queen high, two hearts (I was
heartless). I bet out, he called. A King on the turn, I bet out again, he
called. Queen of hearts on the river
gave me trips, but also three hearts on the board. I just checked and he checked behind me. I showed my trips and he flips
over—Aces! Yeah, in the big blind against
only a limped small blind, he slow-played Aces!
And he was so proud of himself for losing the minimum amount of money
there! Really. He said, “If I had raised, I never would have
bet you off that hand.” Really, sir,
really? If you raise me preflop, you
think I’m calling a raise out of position with QJ off? Guess again.
Of course, I really should have raised, and if I had, he almost surely
then would have re-raised me (or would he have?) and then I go away and he
takes it down. So my bad play worked,
but I’m not using it as an example of how to play tournament poker.
With the
blinds at 150/300 in the big blind, I called a raise to $600 with King-10,
another questionable play. I guess I
figured I was priced in. It was just the
two of us to see a flop that was King-10-x. I led out for $1K, preflop raiser
called. Blank on the turn and I bet $2K,
he called. A third club on the river was
a little scary but I bet it anyway, $3k.
He called and flipped over King-deuce offsuit. Which, of course, is what he raised with
preflop from middle position. And called
me each street even though he had to believe I had a King and therefore, had to
have a better kicker than he did. Thank
you for the chips, sir.
Same level in
the cut-off with Queen-10, I make it $1200 after one player had limped. The guy who had slowplayed AA makes it $3600
on the button. Limper folds, as do I,
but I say to the guy, “Well, you limped with Aces, what could you possibly be
raising with?” He just laughed.
With the
blinds at 200/400, I limped from the small blind with Queen-10 offsuit. Three of us saw the flop. King-10-x on the flop,
I led out for $1,000. Big blind folded
and the other player shoved for $11,500.
I had around $25K at that point.
For some reason, I called. It’s
actually kind of funny hearing my voice notes on this one, because even the
next day, when I was recording it, I am saying into the recorder, “I don’t know
why I called there.” Apparently I had a
good read there, I couldn’t remember my thinking the next day. I must have been fairly confident he was just
making a move. It was a good call. He flipped over Ace-Queen so all he had was
the gutshot. He missed, so by the river
he was a jack-off and my 10’s were good.
Nice chip pick up there.
Early on one
of the most regular regulars was sitting on my immediate right and one of her
chips was between us, but I knew it was hers and told her that it belonged to
her. She thanked me and said, “Oh, you’re
a gentleman.” The dealer at this point
was a guy who always bullshits with me before the tournament starts if I run
into him, and loves to give me a hard time whenever he can, all in good fun. He said, “Don’t call him a gentleman, he’s no
gentleman,”
Remembering
this post here, with feigned indignity I said, “Hey, I want you to know
that I’ve been called a gentleman before by another woman in this very poker
room.” He responded, “”Who called you
that?” And so I said, “If I told you
that, I wouldn’t be a gentleman.”
With the
blinds at 400/800 I had late position so I raised to $2500 with Ace-9
offsuit. Heather was one of the blinds
and called me. Ace-Jack-x on the flop, I
bet out $4,000, she thinks for awhile and then folds.
Same level, a
whole bunch of limpers when it gets to me with Ace-Ace. I make it $4500. The woman to Heather’s left shoves. She had almost as many chips as I did; I know
they had to count it down to be sure when it was over. Of course I called. She flipped over
10-10. That was actually scary. There had been several hands lately where
players had gone all in with pocket 10’s and they’d hit their sets every time. We’d already commented on the table about
10’s being hot. I even joked about being doomed. There was no 10 this time, but there were
four hearts on the board and she had the 10 of hearts. Fortunately, I had the Ace of hearts for the
bigger flush. Almost a double up there.
A few hands
later, short-stacked, Heather shoved light and was busted out—not to me. Suddenly, all the other guys at the table
were giving the guy who busted her and me a hard time for busting out the only
two women at the table, both of whom were good looking.
With blinds
100/600/1200 I had Queen-10 of spades.
One limper, I raised to 4800, only the aforementioned Judy, behind me,
called. Totally whiff the flop, all low
cards. I bet $7,000 and she folded.
Then came a
bad hand against the Grump-alike. I
raised in late position with King-10 off, he and another guy who had also
limped called. Ace-King-x flop, I bet
$15k after both checked the flop. Sorry,
I didn’t make a note of the original raise or the blind levels there. Other guy folded, but Grump-alike shoved for
slightly less than my bet. He showed Ace-Queen, which I was stunned to see he
had originally limped with, especially considering his chip position. That should have been an automatic shove
given his stack. He caught a second Ace
too and I lost a lot of chips. I think
because the guy looked so much like Grump, I put him on deuce-four.
That hurt and
then I was moved to a new table for balance, I got three big hands right away,
pocket 8’s and the dreaded pocket Kings back-to-back in the blinds, then Ace-Queen a few
hands later. No one called my raises on
any of them, and now I looked like a maniac to these guys. And then I went totally card dead and had to
start being aggressive to keep up. The
aggression kept back firing on me and before I knew it I was basically in
shove-or-fold position. So I kept
shoving whenever I could, but I wasn’t getting called, so I was getting a few
chips here and there but I couldn’t get the double up I needed.
And then yes,
I did nit up quite a bit as it had been many hours of poker and we were getting
down to the money. I had so much time
invested in the tournament now I really wanted to cash, even if I couldn’t make
a big score. They were only paying 10,
and once we got down to 20 everyone started playing tighter. It was fairly easy for me because I was so
card-dead, I really didn’t have any tough decisions to make anyway.
Down to 13, I
was now at the same table as the Lightning look alike. He had a decent stack when I first joined him
but then he got into an argument with a tough New Yorker with a definite New York
attitude. NY guy accused faux-Lightning
of showing his cards to the guy to his right (still in the hand), before
folding. A big argument broke up and
faux-Lightning insisted he hadn’t done it, but the guy next to him said he did
accidentally see his cards. Faux-Lightning
got really pissed over the whole thing and actually went on tilt because of it,
and managed to spew away all his chips in just a few more hands.
As soon as he
busted, one of the players from the other table addressed all the players and
said that they had done something yesterday that he was going to suggest we do
today. “Let’s pay two bubbles, we’ll pay
‘em both $200, readjust the rest of prize pool and we won’t have to go hand-for-hand.”
His buddy was at my table co-endorsing this idea. In my position of course I was going to
agree, but I was really shocked that everyone else agreed two, not a single
objection. And thus I was in the money. The next two players to bust would each
get $200, then original min cash for 10th place (and a few places
above that) would get $290 instead of $300.
In very short
order, two short-stacks busted and we assembled the final table. I was assured of at least the $290 pay
out. I was probably the second shortest
stack at the table. Of course I wanted
to move up, but knowing I was at least going to have something to show for a
full day over poker (I believe it was around 10PM at this point), I eagerly
looked to make a move.
So I made a
number of shoves at the final table, with fairly weak hands, and didn’t get
called. That kept me alive but I really
needed a double up. Meanwhile the
shortest stack busted but 9th place was still $290. By this time the antes were like $3k so even
not being in the blinds was costing me chips.
Then, in the big blind when I looked down at pocket 6’s, I figured that
was it. A guy with a huge stack raised
in front of me. I figured I would most
likely be in a race with him and that it was a risk worth taking. If I just folded there, my stack would be too
small to give me any real fold equity. But I thought my shove there might just have
been big enough to get him to fold a lot of hands he could have raised with
(sorry, didn’t make a note of the amounts). So I shoved and he snap called.
He didn’t
just have high cards, he had a pocket pair.
Do I need to tell anyone who reads my blog regularly what pair he had?
Yeah, of
course it was Kings and I got no help on the board and I was done. After I get paid, I knew that was my last opportunity
to identify myself to Judy (and really, make sure it was her, even though I of
course had reviewed her pic on my blog by now).
I think I asked if her name was Judy and was she Jeanne’s friend, and
she said yes and that she did sorta recognize me too. She asked if I was the guy with the blog and
then asked if I was the guy taking notes and if it was for the blog. Yes, the fact that I was writing in a memo
book was the tip off for her.
I said
something about her appearing on my blog, without going into detail. I wouldn’t want to embarrass her at a poker
table (she was still playing of course).
No, I only want to embarrass her on the internet. J
I tweeted
about playing with her and thus found out that she did a three-way chop for
first with the NY guy and the guy who busted me out with KK. That was a great effort on her part because
she had gotten short-stacked way before I did and went hours surviving that
short stack. Great result, Judy, GG.
As for me, I
took my $290 cash out and called it a day.
So if we know that there are at least two guys who closely resemble me in Las Vegas, we can reasonably discern that they only surface occasionally since they are likely too busy servicing the women of your slut parade.
ReplyDeleteI suppose that's possible, Lightning. It's also possible that the Cubs will win the World Series in the near future.
DeleteBut I don't believe either of these two Lightning clones were locals. AG saw hers on the Strip, and the guy I saw at Binions definitely seemed like an out-of-towner.
You do realize that Canada is a part of North AMERICA right? ;-)
ReplyDeleteSo Native American still applies. :-)
Patrick
Native NORTH American, huh, Patrick?
DeleteWell, I suppose if you wanna get technical....