Sunday, May 20, 2012

Thanks, Mom!

This story happened at today's Binions 2PM tournament.  The guy next to me, relatively clean cut, I'd guess late 20's, early 30's, overheard some lady on the other end of the table get a bit snippy with the gentleman next to her.  I don't know what the issue was.  But the guy had recently asked if this tournament has an extended break coming up for food, since it started at 2PM and this was now after 6, and it was clear that with 88 runners, it wasn't going to end until late in the evening.  He was told no, and now, upon hearing the woman getting into it with the man, the guy next to me said that this is why you need a longer break for food at some point.

He said something like, "I don't want to get offend anyone, but in my experience, women tend to get very cranky when they are hungry.  I think that's why we need a food break."

The lady to his left, who was probably late 50's or perhaps a bit older said that wasn't the case with her at all.  She has no problem going long periods of time without food.  Her husband is always asking if she wants to eat, and she says no.

The guy says, "Well, maybe I've been dating the wrong women.  Do you have a daughter?"

The woman says, "Yes, I do.  She just turned 27 and is single.  And she just moved to Las Vegas.  She's an attorney.  But.....she's a bitch."

We all cracked up, and I said, "Her mother folks....her mother!" (That's actually a reference to a line in the Woody Allen movie, Love & Death).

The guy said maybe he wasn't interested after all.

Then she added, "Also, she's turned two guys gay."

The guy said, "Well, then I definitely don't want to meet her."

The woman said, "Well, they said they were gay all along, but I don't know."

We were all giggling about the mother's wonderful description of her very own daughter!  Finally, she meekly said, "No, actually, she's really very nice.  It's just.....well......"

She never finished the sentence, I'm not sure if she was stopped because she had to start paying attention to the game or because she really didn't know how to finish it.

About a 1/2 hour later, another woman joined our table sitting right next to the lady with the bitch attorney for a daughter.  The two ladies were chatting and when the first lady mentioned that her daughter was an attorney, the guy next to me and I once again started giggling, leaving the new woman at the table wondering what was so funny.  The mom alluded to a comment she made earlier without explaining it.  The other guy and I were too gentlemanly to repeat her comment.

I am left wondering if the daughter knows her dear old mom thinks she's a bitch!


  1. Great post-Mother's Day story... :)

    1. Yeah, I was thinking this was really a Mother's Day post. But I didn't want to hold it until next year.

  2. I'm not surprised that a female attorney would be called a bitch, even by her mother. I always wanted to be an attorney. *sigh*