Sunday, August 4, 2013

The Tournament With Blogger Look-Alikes and a Familiar.....Face

On the last weekend of April, I had some tournament success on back-to-back days.  The Saturday tournament has already been discussed (see here).  Here’s what happened on Sunday.

It was back to Binions for me, the weekend 2PM Deepstack.  I had arrived in town the Friday of the prior weekend so I could make it time for their “Super Saturday” $160 tourn, which didn’t go so well.  So now I was back for just their regular $125 tournament. 
Probably because of the big turnout the week before, the $25K guarantee tournament, this one was not that well attended, and in fact, they had to make an overlay to make their $10K guarantee.  The delightful Heather decided to play rather than deal and we chatted a bit before the tournament started.  She had dealt to me the previous night at MGM, and this took place the first or second weekend the popular nightclub had opened, as discussed in The Slut Parade post. She asked me what time I had left, because she wanted to know if I was there when they started taking girls out of the clubs on stretchers.  Actually, I had missed that.  I asked if she knew what happened to them.  She could only speculate that maybe they had had too much too drink.  Hopefully it wasn’t anything stronger (or less legal) than alcohol. 
But I offered another possible explanation.  “Maybe some of them broke their ankles, falling off their shoes?”  As I had mentioned, a lot of the girls seemed to have trouble walking in their heels.  Many wobbled (even before they had started drinking) and many fell off them or fell over.  As the night wore on, it was common to see more and more of them carry their shoes and walk through the casino barefoot.  Some even had two pair of shoes with them, so they could walk through the casino in flats.
Through the course of the tournament I encountered two blogger look-alikes.  There was this guy that looked like an older version of Poker Grump. Not quite old enough to be Grump’s father, but close.  This is a guy I’ve seen before, for sure at this tournament and perhaps at other venues around town. 
Then there was a Lightning look-alike. What’s weird about that is that Alaskagal had earlier in the week tweeted about dealing to a guy who looked like Lightning.  When I tweeted about this, it was somehow determined that my Lightning look-alike wasn’t the same Lightning look-alike that AG had seen.  Can you imagine there being three people in the world who look like Lightning?  Would a just god play such a cruel trick on us?  Just asking.
There was one other person in the tournament I thought I recognized, a woman who I was at the same table with off and on as they kept breaking tables and moving us around to balance things.  She had a familiar face, but I couldn’t place her at first.  It was driving me crazy, and slowly, slowly, it started dawning on me.  Not only did I know her, but I was quite familiar with her cleavage.  And where had I seen her cleavage before?  I know! I know!
On this very blog, that’s where.
Yeah, I was becoming convinced that the lady in question was Judy, the woman in the center of the picture on the post here.  Of the three ladies in that picture, Judy was the one I hadn’t met before.  So basically, my introduction to her pretty much consisted of her pulling down her top for me and demanding that I take a picture of her that way.
Sigh. If only more women would introduce themselves to me like that.
Truth be told, it really wasn’t Judy’s idea to pose for that picture.  I’m not sure she was really clear on what was going on that day.  It was all her pal Jeanne’s idea, based on how I met Jeanne (see here), which btw was at this very same Binions tournament over a year ago.
If it is Jeanne’s belief that all of her girlfriends must reveal their breasts to me when she introduces us, I can only hope that she introduces me to more of her girlfriends.
Furthermore, I pray that one of her girlfriends is Kate Upton.

But I was in a quandary as to how to ask Judy—if this was indeed Judy—if we had met before and if she was indeed one of the stars of a previous blog post of mine.  I should point out that Judy was revealing no cleavage on this day so I actually had to recognize her from her face—proving that yes, I can do that!  Judy did not seem to recognize me.  Maybe she did and felt it was just too awkward to ask a guy, “Say didn’t you take a picture of me with my shirt pulled down once and post it on the  internet?”  Because if she’s wrong, the obvious comeback is, “No, but would you like me too?”  As I said….awkward.
From my point of view, asking a woman if I’ve taken a picture of her like that—and posted it for the entire internet to see—is kinda awkward too. Or, “Haven’t I photographed your breasts?” just seems like the worst introductory line in the history of mankind.
Then too, although we were at the same table on-and-off throughout the tourney, I was never sitting next to her so I could talk to her discreetly.  And you all know that I am the king of discretion.  Even when it finally dawned on me that I could just say, “Aren’t you Judy, Jeanne’s friend?” and not even mention the photograph,  it seemed to me that I would have to bring up my blog, or perhaps she would, and I still am not sure to handle my blog at a poker table.  A big part of me doesn’t want it known to the people I’m playing with that I have a blog and/or am a columnist for a poker mag.  I feel they will think I’m a better player than I am and I think it’s usually to my advantage that people think I’m not a good player.  Lord knows, I give plenty of evidence to that with my play.
I really shouldn’t be afraid to mention it myself.  Other people have outted me right at the poker table, as both a blogger and a poker columnist.  And you know what, 99% of the people who hear this don’t give a rat’s ass about it.  The most I get is, “You write a blog?”  And when I say yes, they look interested for all of 1/10th of a second and then don’t say another word about it.

Anyway, I’ll get back to Judy, but I should probably start talking about the tournament, since this is, first and foremost, a serious poker blog.
The tournament started and directly to my right was a very friendly guy, who seemed like a local regular but was actually visiting from Canada.  He looked to me like he might have been an Indian.  Not an Indian from India but a….well, I guess I should call him a native American but how can I do that if he’s from Canada, eh?  Anyway, he had a deep, booming voice and was just about the nicest guy in the world.  Funny, too.
Early in the tournament, he noticed me writing notes and said, “Hey, no notes.  That’s against the PGA rules!”
I replied, “The PGA rules?  Ok, I won’t take notes when I play golf.”
I badly misplayed an early hand and won chips only because my opponent misplayed it even more.  In the small blind it folded to me.  I had Queen-Jack off so I just limped, a terrible move, I know.  I definitely should have raised.  The big blind, an elderly gentleman, just checked behind me.  Flop was Queen high, two hearts (I was heartless).  I bet out, he called.  A King on the turn, I bet out again, he called.  Queen of hearts on the river gave me trips, but also three hearts on the board.  I just checked and he checked behind me.  I showed my trips and he flips over—Aces!  Yeah, in the big blind against only a limped small blind, he slow-played Aces!  And he was so proud of himself for losing the minimum amount of money there!  Really.  He said, “If I had raised, I never would have bet you off that hand.”  Really, sir, really?  If you raise me preflop, you think I’m calling a raise out of position with QJ off?  Guess again.  Of course, I really should have raised, and if I had, he almost surely then would have re-raised me (or would he have?) and then I go away and he takes it down.  So my bad play worked, but I’m not using it as an example of how to play tournament poker.
With the blinds at 150/300 in the big blind, I called a raise to $600 with King-10, another questionable play.  I guess I figured I was priced in.  It was just the two of us to see a flop that was King-10-x. I led out for $1K, preflop raiser called.  Blank on the turn and I bet $2K, he called.  A third club on the river was a little scary but I bet it anyway, $3k.  He called and flipped over King-deuce offsuit.  Which, of course, is what he raised with preflop from middle position.  And called me each street even though he had to believe I had a King and therefore, had to have a better kicker than he did.  Thank you for the chips, sir.
Same level in the cut-off with Queen-10, I make it $1200 after one player had limped.  The guy who had slowplayed AA makes it $3600 on the button.  Limper folds, as do I, but I say to the guy, “Well, you limped with Aces, what could you possibly be raising with?”  He just laughed.
With the blinds at 200/400, I limped from the small blind with Queen-10 offsuit.  Three of us saw the flop. King-10-x on the flop, I led out for $1,000.  Big blind folded and the other player shoved for $11,500.  I had around $25K at that point.  For some reason, I called.  It’s actually kind of funny hearing my voice notes on this one, because even the next day, when I was recording it, I am saying into the recorder, “I don’t know why I called there.”  Apparently I had a good read there, I couldn’t remember my thinking the next day.  I must have been fairly confident he was just making a move.  It was a good call.  He flipped over Ace-Queen so all he had was the gutshot.  He missed, so by the river he was a jack-off and my 10’s were good.  Nice chip pick up there.
Early on one of the most regular regulars was sitting on my immediate right and one of her chips was between us, but I knew it was hers and told her that it belonged to her.  She thanked me and said, “Oh, you’re a gentleman.”  The dealer at this point was a guy who always bullshits with me before the tournament starts if I run into him, and loves to give me a hard time whenever he can, all in good fun.  He said, “Don’t call him a gentleman, he’s no gentleman,”
Remembering this post here, with feigned indignity I said, “Hey, I want you to know that I’ve been called a gentleman before by another woman in this very poker room.”  He responded, “”Who called you that?”  And so I said, “If I told you that, I wouldn’t be a gentleman.”
With the blinds at 400/800 I had late position so I raised to $2500 with Ace-9 offsuit.  Heather was one of the blinds and called me.  Ace-Jack-x on the flop, I bet out $4,000, she thinks for awhile and then folds.
Same level, a whole bunch of limpers when it gets to me with Ace-Ace.  I make it $4500.  The woman to Heather’s left shoves.  She had almost as many chips as I did; I know they had to count it down to be sure when it was over.  Of course I called. She flipped over 10-10.  That was actually scary.  There had been several hands lately where players had gone all in with pocket 10’s and they’d hit their sets every time.  We’d already commented on the table about 10’s being hot. I even joked about being doomed.  There was no 10 this time, but there were four hearts on the board and she had the 10 of hearts.  Fortunately, I had the Ace of hearts for the bigger flush.  Almost a double up there.
A few hands later, short-stacked, Heather shoved light and was busted out—not to me.  Suddenly, all the other guys at the table were giving the guy who busted her and me a hard time for busting out the only two women at the table, both of whom were good looking.
With blinds 100/600/1200 I had Queen-10 of spades.  One limper, I raised to 4800, only the aforementioned Judy, behind me, called.  Totally whiff the flop, all low cards.  I bet $7,000 and she folded. 
Then came a bad hand against the Grump-alike.  I raised in late position with King-10 off, he and another guy who had also limped called.  Ace-King-x flop, I bet $15k after both checked the flop.  Sorry, I didn’t make a note of the original raise or the blind levels there.  Other guy folded, but Grump-alike shoved for slightly less than my bet. He showed Ace-Queen, which I was stunned to see he had originally limped with, especially considering his chip position.  That should have been an automatic shove given his stack.  He caught a second Ace too and I lost a lot of chips.  I think because the guy looked so much like Grump, I put him on deuce-four.
That hurt and then I was moved to a new table for balance, I got three big hands right away, pocket 8’s and the dreaded pocket Kings back-to-back in the blinds, then Ace-Queen a few hands later.  No one called my raises on any of them, and now I looked like a maniac to these guys.  And then I went totally card dead and had to start being aggressive to keep up.  The aggression kept back firing on me and before I knew it I was basically in shove-or-fold position.  So I kept shoving whenever I could, but I wasn’t getting called, so I was getting a few chips here and there but I couldn’t get the double up I needed. 
And then yes, I did nit up quite a bit as it had been many hours of poker and we were getting down to the money.  I had so much time invested in the tournament now I really wanted to cash, even if I couldn’t make a big score.  They were only paying 10, and once we got down to 20 everyone started playing tighter.  It was fairly easy for me because I was so card-dead, I really didn’t have any tough decisions to make anyway.
Down to 13, I was now at the same table as the Lightning look alike.  He had a decent stack when I first joined him but then he got into an argument with a tough New Yorker with a definite New York attitude.  NY guy accused faux-Lightning of showing his cards to the guy to his right (still in the hand), before folding.  A big argument broke up and faux-Lightning insisted he hadn’t done it, but the guy next to him said he did accidentally see his cards.  Faux-Lightning got really pissed over the whole thing and actually went on tilt because of it, and managed to spew away all his chips in just a few more hands.
As soon as he busted, one of the players from the other table addressed all the players and said that they had done something yesterday that he was going to suggest we do today.  “Let’s pay two bubbles, we’ll pay ‘em both $200, readjust the rest of prize pool and we won’t have to go hand-for-hand.” His buddy was at my table co-endorsing this idea.  In my position of course I was going to agree, but I was really shocked that everyone else agreed two, not a single objection. And thus I was in the money. The next two players to bust would each get $200, then original min cash for 10th place (and a few places above that) would get $290 instead of $300.
In very short order, two short-stacks busted and we assembled the final table.  I was assured of at least the $290 pay out.  I was probably the second shortest stack at the table.   Of course I wanted to move up, but knowing I was at least going to have something to show for a full day over poker (I believe it was around 10PM at this point), I eagerly looked to make a move.
So I made a number of shoves at the final table, with fairly weak hands, and didn’t get called.  That kept me alive but I really needed a double up.  Meanwhile the shortest stack busted but 9th place was still $290.  By this time the antes were like $3k so even not being in the blinds was costing me chips.  Then, in the big blind when I looked down at pocket 6’s, I figured that was it.  A guy with a huge stack raised in front of me.  I figured I would most likely be in a race with him and that it was a risk worth taking.  If I just folded there, my stack would be too small to give me any real fold equity.  But I thought my shove there might just have been big enough to get him to fold a lot of hands he could have raised with (sorry, didn’t make a note of the amounts). So I shoved and he snap called.
He didn’t just have high cards, he had a pocket pair.  Do I need to tell anyone who reads my blog regularly what pair he had?
Yeah, of course it was Kings and I got no help on the board and I was done.  After I get paid, I knew that was my last opportunity to identify myself to Judy (and really, make sure it was her, even though I of course had reviewed her pic on my blog by now).  I think I asked if her name was Judy and was she Jeanne’s friend, and she said yes and that she did sorta recognize me too.  She asked if I was the guy with the blog and then asked if I was the guy taking notes and if it was for the blog.  Yes, the fact that I was writing in a memo book was the tip off for her.
I said something about her appearing on my blog, without going into detail.  I wouldn’t want to embarrass her at a poker table (she was still playing of course).  No, I only want to embarrass her on the internet. J
I tweeted about playing with her and thus found out that she did a three-way chop for first with the NY guy and the guy who busted me out with KK.  That was a great effort on her part because she had gotten short-stacked way before I did and went hours surviving that short stack.  Great result, Judy, GG.
As for me, I took my $290 cash out and called it a day.


  1. So if we know that there are at least two guys who closely resemble me in Las Vegas, we can reasonably discern that they only surface occasionally since they are likely too busy servicing the women of your slut parade.

    1. I suppose that's possible, Lightning. It's also possible that the Cubs will win the World Series in the near future.

      But I don't believe either of these two Lightning clones were locals. AG saw hers on the Strip, and the guy I saw at Binions definitely seemed like an out-of-towner.

  2. You do realize that Canada is a part of North AMERICA right? ;-)

    So Native American still applies. :-)


    1. Native NORTH American, huh, Patrick?

      Well, I suppose if you wanna get technical....