"That's Not The Way to Get it, Genius!"

Poker is a game of skill, right? Or is it a game of luck?  Well, of course, it’s both.  But this post is about poker being a game of luck.  You see, there was this player at the table who intentionally tried to take all the skill out of the game.  And then there was yours truly, who just got lucky.  No, I don’t mean that I “got lucky” in the sense I ran into someone like, oh, say, Christina Hendricks and, well…you know.  I mean I got lucky in the poker sense.

This is from a session in late August, mid-week. I mentioned a “former reg” in a couple of recent posts (see here and here).  As I did previously, I’ll just refer to him as “FR.”  FR grinds for a living and used to have a pretty big presence in online poker before Black Friday.  I guess I’m starting to see him more and more lately, so I may have to eventually remove the “former” from his name, but for now we’ll keep calling him FR.

The guy to my left was a local but I didn’t recognize him as a regular.  He had mentioned that he had tickets to see the show that evening at BSC, which was convenient since that was where this took place. He was pretty much an aggro, which was annoying for me since he had position on me.

His stack had grown and shrunk several times, as is fairly common with this style of play.  When the time of his show approached, as I pick up the story, he was down to about $50-$60.  On the button, he put his stack out in front of him before the dealer even had peeled off a card.  “Can I go all in now?”  He explained that he had to leave for his show in a few minutes and would just assume not have to cash out such a small amount of chips.  He would be ok with doubling it and cashing out for over $100, but his current stack wasn’t worth the effort.

I’m not sure if the dealer actually said he couldn’t do it, but the guy did pull back his chips before getting his first card.  However, it was pretty clear—at least to me—that he intended to shove blind on this hand.  A few people limped in front of him, I folded some crap hand, and sure enough, he put his entire stack out when it was his turn.

Not everyone had heard him talk about him getting ready to leave for the show, so a few expressed surprise at his peflop shove.  And he then made it clear why he was doing it, and when everyone folded and he picked up a few bucks, he made it clear he was going to keep doing the same thing until he lost his chips—or, I guess, until he got a double-up and had enough chips to warrant a trip to the cashier.  He did say, “Hey, I want action.”

Really?  That’s how you want to play?  I was not pleased.  I mean, if you want a crap-shoot, why not take your money to the craps table and put it on pass line.  Or the roulette table and put it on red or black?  Why ruin a perfectly good poker game?

I realize that this is a good opportunity for someone—if they get a hand.  Not necessarily a great hand, just a little better than average.  Right?  I mean, if you have a hand that is 51-49 favorite over a totally random hand, you should be willing to go heads up with the guy, no?  I guess you could use an odds calculator to figure out what starting hands to play in such a situation.  If someone wants to do that, be my guest.

But it certainly takes all the art, all the skill out of the game (although you do have to worry about the other players, right?).  I just don’t find this at all fun, just stupid.  It’s no longer poker, it’s just a lottery, it’s a slot-machine.  Although. when he made it clear that he was going to keep doing this, I was perfectly willing to be dealt Aces (or Kings, or Queens or Jacks….) and give it a go.  It didn’t happen.  The only hands I was getting were hands that would only be a slight favorite against 7-2.

He did this for a few hands, and of course no one called.  Some of the other players actually found this amusing.  One or two said, “This is great.”  The guy himself said, as he was increasingly getting only the blinds, “At least you’ve all got a story to tell.”  Hmm…..what could I do with a story like this?  Let me think.

Which brings us to FR.  FR came into the game a hand or two after this had started.  And as he was dealt his first hand, he had his face buried in his phone, and didn’t hear any of the discussion of this guy’s “system” (for lack of a better word).  By now, he was the only player at the table that wasn’t aware that guy intended to shove—totally blind—on the first hand FR was dealt. So FR looked at his cards, limped in, and thus was the only limper when the guy once again shoved.

FR looked up from his phone and said, “Really?”  I don’t think he even knew the guy had shoved without looking.  He folded, annoyed.

The guy said, as he took in his $5 pot, “I’m just looking for action.”

FR, now fairly livid, said to him, “Well, that’s not the way to get it, genius!”  One of his neighbors explained the situation to him, and also made it clear he had to leave soon for the show.  With that, FR got up and said, “Hopefully he’ll be gone by the time I get back,” and headed off to the Mens Room, presumably.

A hand or two later, one of the guys who thought it was just awesome that this clown was doing this went ahead and called the guy’s shove.  “I’m in, I’m in….let’s do it” were his words. 

So it was heads up, and the guy said, “I bet I have a big hand,” as he flipped them over.  Not quite.  Unless you think 8-5 offsuit is a big hand.  The guy who was willing to gamble showed pocket 4’s.  Of course, the guy caught an 8 and doubled up.  And had no choice but to take his nearly $120 or so to the cage to cash out.  Meanwhile, the guy with the pocket 4’s was laughing, he actually seemed to be enjoying losing his money this way.

There was only one hand that I was involved in from this session worth talking about.  I was having an up-and-down session, a bit more down than up, when I was dealt a couple of Aces in late position.  I had about $115 left, from $200.  I raised to $12 and had two callers.

The flop was Jack-8-x and the first player led out for $15, and the other guy called.  I raised to $50.  The first guy hesitated a bit, which I read as deciding whether to call or fold.  He finally called.  The other guy folded.  The turn was a blank, the guy checked and I shoved.  He snap-called and showed his pocket 8’s.  Ooops.  I guess his hesitancy on the flop was whether to re-raise, not fold.  I flipped over my rockets and started to reach for my wallet to rebuy.  Until I saw the river card….a very sexy looking Ace.  I guess you could call me a luckbox, right, Coach?

I managed to avoid giving the insincere apology to the guy.  Instead, I said, “Oh man, that’s tough.”  He said, “Nice hand.”  I responded, “Yeah, I know what that really means, and I deserve it.”  I think he forced a laugh.

I chipped up a bit the rest of the evening, and finally left with an extra $125 more in my pocket than I had arrived with.

It’s a skill game, right?