Escape From Caesars Palace

This is really a “guest post” from my friend Don, who I’ve mentioned numerous times on this blog. In fact, he’s done guest posts for me before, here, for example. I think the circumstances under which I received this report are interesting.  He didn’t verbally tell me this story, nor did he write it up as an official submission (as if this blog had anything as formal as an “official” submission!).  No, it was a series of text messages.  

This was actually texted to me the Sunday of Memorial Day Weekend, which also happened to be the day I was driving up to Vegas myself for a “meet up game” that I'll hopefully tell you about some time in the future.  If not, I’m sure Lightning will blog about it soon if he hasn’t already.

The subject was not poker but paid parking, a topic I’ve covered quite a bit over the past few years, ever since Vegas Strip casinos decided to charge for the privilege of losing all your money to them playing games where the odds are legally stacked against you. It was great timing, because at the time I was in the middle of trying to figure out my own personal solution to the pay-for-parking problem.  As I write this, that situation has mostly been resolved (but perhaps not totally) and I definitely want to tell you that story when I have time to do an 87-part blog post (only a slight exaggeration). So the timing was perfect, even more so because I could actually listen to Don’s text messages while driving to Vegas.

I recently acquired a new car and it has “Android Auto.”  When you plug your phone in, the Google map program displays on the video screen that all new cars come with these days.  But also, it will read you any text messages that come in while you drive. The text-to-speech technology is pretty good, and a pleasant female voice reads you your messages.

So for a nice chunk of the trip, I was listening to Don’s tale of woe, and imagining that the sweet female voice I was hearing was actually Don’s (I know that sounds weird).  One glitch though.  For some reason, every time a new text came it, the program would repeat Don’s previous message before reading the new one.  Since I really didn’t have anything better to do than hear Don’s story, I didn’t mind one bit, in fact, it was like watching the “previously on” segments of a TV show you are binging.  A nice reminder of where we were in the story.

What you need to know is that Caesars (and I presume MGM too) recently changed their paid parking rules.  I believe when they first resumed charging for parking after reopening, they allowed locals to park for free.  So, Don was getting free parking as a Vegas resident, but now, no more.  Three hours max for free (which is two hours more than the tourists get)  Here’s what Don texted me, more of less verbatim.

This is how bad the night went.  I never dragged a pot, lost a $450 pot to a 2 outer on the river and that's NOT what tilted me about this evening.  Trying to get out of the Caesars garage did.

They changed their parking rules.  Locals only get 3 hours free, then they have to pay the stupidly high fees.  So, when I busted, I was about 90 minutes into my session and said "well no point in rebuying now" and headed to the garage.  That was at 11:20pm.

I get near the elevators and there is a crazy long line at the payment kiosks.  I thought "no problem there is one on every floor."  So, I walk up 2 flights of stairs and find no payment kiosks.  They still have signs that say they are on every floor, but they aren't.

I walk back down to the second floor, no kiosk.  I walk back into the casino, wait in line.  The kiosk there won't read my ID.

There's a speaker right over the kiosk, but I can't hear the support people.  So, I go back to the poker room AND to the Caesars Rewards desk to try to find a number that I can call on my phone.  They don't have one.

I walk back to my car (again up the stairs because there's a ton of people in the elevator lobby).  I get into the parking area and see a really long line to exit.  I walk to my car in the back of the garage on the 3rd floor.  As I do, I see a long line from the upper floors and cars merging from all over on floor 3 to exit.  The cars on the 3rd floor only have 1 lane to get out and they are backed up behind my car, around the corner, and snaking back towards the casino entrance.

I sit in my car without starting it for 10 minutes and see 1 car pass behind mine.  I'm like "f*ck this, it'll be over an hour before I even get near the exit."  So, I walk back down to the casino to wait.  I find a different payment kiosk, which also won't take my local ID but where I can hear support.  People behind me are bitching at me and I say "look, this thing won't read my ID, it's not my fault parking here is a f*cking joke."

The service rep answers and tells me to scan the ID at the exit.  I reply "that's great, but I've already been here 2 hours and I'm never getting out of the god damn garage before my 3 hours is up."  He says to ask for him by name and he will make a note for his coworkers to let me out.

I go sit by a slot machine - not playing, just sitting there with my back to the machine to watch the slut parade around the Vanderpump Lounge.  I think that's named for a reality TV star, but for all I know a "Vanderpump" could be some kind of German sex toy.

I wait about 45 minutes, walk to the elevators, see no line, and go to my car.  The line to exit is only about 10 cars long now and I head out.  I get to the gate and scan my ticket.  It still reads the $23 I was supposed to pay about 90 minutes ago, so either the service rep noted my parking ticket number or their system recorded the  time when I initially tried to pay.  I scan my ID a few times, it still doesn't read it.  So, I push the service button and finally get out of the garage.

To be fair, I did stop for gas on my way home.  But, I walked in my door at 1:10am.  Remember, I INITIALLY LEFT THE POKER ROOM AT 11:20pm.  So, it took me 1 hour and 50 minutes to get home from playing a 1 hour and 30 minute poker session - in which I never won a hand.

I've ridden buses in this town and I know that, even on a busy Saturday night, I could have caught the strip express bus, waited outside the south strip transfer terminal with the homeless for 30 minutes to catch the Warm Springs bus.  Taken that to right across from the parking lot Google maps says is my house and walked home in LESS TIME than it took to get my car from the Caesars garage here.

Don’s pain kept me entertained for a good portion of my drive.  I did wonder how the gate finally opened and he wasn’t sure, but assumed it might have been from the guy he talked to passing his ticket number around.  Before I even had a chance to ask him, Don added that I could use this story in the blog if I liked!  He knows me.  This story is right up my alley. My thanks to Don for sharing his story with me and allowing me to share it with you.

I especially loved the Vanderpump joke but to be honest, if he had made it a week earlier I wouldn’t have had a clue what he was talking about.  It was just days earlier I first heard the name Lisa Vanderpump when it was announced she was doing the first “Shuffle Up and Deal” at the WSOP.  I had never heard of her.

Also, I should explain that during my last trip to Vegas in April, I tried to find Don’s house using Google Maps, and even though he is located on a perfectly normal street in an ordinary part of Vegas, the Map program directed me to a parking lot behind his house, insisting that that was where Don lived.

Before I post this, I want to make an editorial comment on the whole paid parking situation in Vegas, if I may.  (Of course I may, it’s my damn blog and no one can stop me).  It’s not just the cost of the parking that pisses people off, although that ain’t nothing.  It’s the ancillary problems that it causes, as Don found out.  Without paid parking, everybody leaves that very busy Caesars garage (it was after all the Saturday night of Memorial Day Weekend) smoothly and promptly.  But to get that damn parking fee from us, or make us come up with some way to get free parking, they have kiosks to deal with, tickets to lose, credit card payments to make. And sometimes the damn gate just stops working for no obvious reason. If you’ve ever left a Strip casino that charges for parking on a busy night, you know it is hell to get out of there, even if you don’t have to personally pay to park.  You get stuck in a long line behind people who haven’t figured it out.  Maybe they forgot to pay, maybe they lost their ticket, maybe the damn ticket that should work doesn’t, maybe their card that should work doesn't.  And even if every single car in front of you exits without a major issue, it still takes three times as long to get out of there as it would if there was no gate and no damn parking payment required from anyone.

So, if you thought I might have changed my mind on how much paid parking in Vegas sucks, well, think again.

Don's Incredible "Woman Said" Session

WARNING:  This is a "woman said" tale and is really, really out there.  I mean this is probably several times more salacious than anything I've ever posted before.  Those of you are who sensitive to this type of material may want to think twice about proceeding.

But I must say I am lucky that my friend Don was able to provide this tale from a recent poker session of his in Vegas for us.  It has been way too long since I've been able to provide you a story of the "woman said" category and I miss them.  I hope I can someday write a new one of my own, but this one from Don is definitely a worthy addition to that label.

So, with that fair warning, take it away, Don.

A very loud, somewhat drunk woman comes into the poker room and is first on the list because. She decides she wants my table, proclaiming it's the "fun table". One of the guys is not far from leaving and tells her as much.  She is talking loudly to her friend the whole time she is waiting and talking loudly is something she will do nonstop for her entire time in the room.

When she gets to the table we find out she is a stay-at-home mother of two, that she has also been a bartender and a manager at a chain restaurant/bar.  Also that she met her husband in college and that they've been together for 15 years and married for almost 9—this last fact is important later in the story.

Her mostly monologue goes on throughout the session, although a few other people, myself included, do join the banter.

Shortly after sitting down she says "shit" and then asks the dealer if swearing is okay.  Being that it is after 3am on a Friday night, he replies that it's mostly fine as long as it's not directed at other players and other players aren't upset by it.  So, she continues to freely use profanity.

She also likes to give people nicknames.  She is Mel, because her given name is Melissa and in 5th grade when "you can't spell and are still figuring yourself out, she dropped the 'issa' and has never looked back." Mel proceeds to nickname me "Red" because I'm wearing a red shirt.  I ask "well what if I'm not wearing a red shirt tomorrow and we play?". She said I'll still be "Red" because once she nicknames someone, that's it.

The guy next to me is wearing green as are two other players at the table who she calls "Drew" (short for Andrew) and "Mike" (because that's his name and she likes the name Mike).  But, my neighbor can't be "green" because she's already used shirt color for my nickname, so she gives him a choice of "Leprechaun" or "Green Goblin."  He chose "Leprechaun" and remained so for the rest of Mel's time at the table.

So, play goes on with Mel talking loudly and almost nonstop.  A new dealer, Reginald, pushes in.  He a good guy, but he is younger and less tolerant of cursing at the table.  He mentions this to Mel a couple times and she said she asked about it before he got to the table and was told it was okay—I then relayed to Reginald that she was told it usually wasn't a problem as long as no one minded and it wasn't directed at another player.  He was okay with that, although he did ask Mel to try to rein it in a little, which she did for a bit.

Then, Mel got beaten in back-to-back hands by Mike (a very small pot) and Leprechaun in a $50 or so pot with a lucky river.  Mel got a bit upset and said.  "Dammit, and I like you guys. If I weren't married, I could f*ck that green cock."

Reginald told Mel that the comment was inappropriate, to which she replied "it wasn't directed at anyone, there are 3 guys wearing green here and I didn't say which green cock I would f*ck."

Reginald turned a little red and Mike said "Mel I'd say if it's something that would embarrass Reginald, then it went too far."  While she laughed at that she was still a bit upset that this particular cursing was not allowed and again said something about f*cking a green cock.  At this point, Reginald, clearly fed up said "look you don't have to talk about f*cking green cock, so just don't."

Mel was a little annoyed but, acquiesced and while Reginald remained as dealer didn't swear.  However, she did say that she couldn't use any curse words or dirty language, you know, words like "F" (meaning f*ck) or "C" (meaning cock) or "A" (meaning ass).

Time passes and another dealer pushes in.  Mel, now a bit chastised, continues to not swear and use other more family friendly words for things—like "buttocks" instead of "ass".

As she going on in her monologue, Mel mentions that she chose our table because "there are 2 vag's over there" (referring to the 2 women at the other table) and she thought she "should spread the vag's around."

The dealer has clearly worked graveyard for a while and at this point indicates he is less particular about the swearing rule than Reginald, which ultimately leads to the next "woman said" moment.

Mel's monologue turns to her family.  She talks about her daughters, 4 and 6.  She talks about her husband and how they met at college.  She then says that they've been married almost 9 years and that means that it's getting close to their 10 year anniversary promise, "her buttocks."  Now, Mel is a little overweight and was wearing a dress, so I really didn't notice her behind.  But, I thought, getting a butt lift seems like a weird 10th anniversary gift, but hey to each their own.

I was wrong about the meaning. A few minutes later Mel says, "yup in a little over a year, my buttocks is losing its virginity.  I'm kind of worried about it.  I've heard it hurts, and that I'm going to need a lot of lube, but we promised."  After some discussion that it was natural and wouldn't hurt too much, Mel said "yep, I promised.  I figured at 10 years, the marriage is losing its excitement and that he'd need a new hole.  So, I figured that the ass would keep him from screwing around with other women.  I'm not thrilled about it, but if it keeps him interested, then it's better than the alternative.  I guess anal can save your marriage."

Don's story ends there.  Apparently this got a laugh and everyone moved on.  Perhaps Don (or even yours truly) wil run into Mel a year from now and find out how it went.

Thanks for the great story, Don!

It Makes You Wonder, Doesn't It?

My friend Don texted me this tale the other night, something he had just witnessed while attending a Stevie Wonder concert at Park MGM (yes, he doesn't spend all of his free time playing poker).  He thought my readers, particularly those of you who are fans of a particular kind of popular post, would find it of interest.  So thank you Don, and I'll let Don tell you what he saw at the concert.

Directly in front of me are two "older" Indian gentlemen (late 40s-early 50s) and two attractive, twenty-something ladies, one African-American, one Asian.  I'm sure the show cost the Indian gentlemen quite a bit since they weren't just paying for the tickets but also for their companions' time.  So, all show the guys are clearly into the music and the ladies are sitting there bored, posting on Instagram, not clapping, not singing, not dancing, nothing.  Then the last song starts and they both start rocking out.  What song did Stevie Wonder play to elicit that reaction from two "escorts" you ask???

"Part Time Lovers"

I can't make this shit up.

Guest Post: Norwegians Invade Venetian (Part 2)

Here's part 2 of guest-blogger Eivind Brenne's report on his recent visit to Vegas to play the Venetian Deepstacks.  You can find part 1 here.

=  =  =  =  =  =

Here we are again. Just over 2 months after our last trip to Vegas. Work in the Oil & Gas sector had not really picked up yet after the low season in the North Sea. Again, our minds were drifting off to Vegas and FM pointed out that he would soon turn 50 years and could play in the senior’s event next time at the Venetian DSE. As it turned out, such an event took place just two days after he turned 50 in the January DSE. He called me from his house in Maine and said he was planning on taking a short trip down to Vegas to play in the senior’s event. The day after I gave it some thinking and called him back and told him. “No way you are going to Vegas alone. I’m coming with you!!” Ohh crap. I had just promised my buddy to go to Vegas with him without even asking my wife. So, I found a good opportunity when we were having dinner at a restaurant in Bangkok and mentioned this. She looked at me and said sure, why not? Then my daughter of 5 years said “NO can do!” (With a slight smile). “You can only go if you buy me lots of toys.' So, we logged onto EBay with my phone and started browsing for her favorite toys and we chose some and shipped them to FM’s house in Maine, so he could bring them to Vegas for me. Then I asked my daughter if I now could get a “visa” to go to visit my friend FM. “Granted” she said and gave me a pretend “visa” stamp on my hand. Awesome!

I am blessed to have such a nice family when I want to go to play some poker. My wife knows that I never over spend money on poker or gambling, and that the rest of my time I spend with my family taking care of our child.

Actually, this reminds me of a story a few years earlier when my buddy FM called, and we started talking about our next Vegas trip. I’m not sure I should tell you this story, but here it goes. In the aftermath I’m not really proud of this. That time, I asked FM on the phone “When should we go to Vegas again?” "How about tomorrow?" FM said. "Hmmm. I’m going to have to get back to you on that one. Give me 5 min." My wife had already gone to sleep about 30 minutes prior to this. I snuck into the bedroom and asked my wife if she was sleeping. Not yet she said. Listen, I said……. You know my buddy FM called and we ended up talking about our next Vegas trip. Ok she said. "When are you planning to go?" Ehhhh, tomorrow. A brief moment of silence occurred, and she finally said yes. Not an angry yes. Then she said. “I’ll drive you to the airport tomorrow. As I closed the door to the bedroom I started thinking. “Did I just wake up my wife and asked her if I could go to Vegas tomorrow???" Almost shocked at what I really did, I grabbed my credit card and booked the trip. Ok, judge me whoever wants to J

Back to January,2018. I booked a ticket with the same Chinese airline. Hainan Airlines, to be more specific. This time I got a real good deal for a business class ticket, so I took them up on the offer. The 3 hours of customs lineup were still fresh in my mind from my last trip. The day of the travel finally came, and I really enjoyed the trip to Vegas. On the flight from Beijing to Vegas in a brand new 787 Dreamliner, I was treated with a 7-course dinner and unlimited drinks served by very attractive Asian flight attendants. 

Hmmmm, no, they did not really look like this, but in my mind they did.

After we landed I was the second person out of the airplane and I started walking very fast. No way I’m going to be last in the queue this time! I came to the immigration check point and no one was there!  A lady that was preparing the queue system said. “You are too early” The immigration staff has not yet arrived to handle your flight. Ohh my. This time I was too early. Then I hear a gentleman sitting in the green card slot saying, "Come over here, I’ll get you through." I thanked him, and he asked me what I was doing in Vegas. "I’m here to play poker." "Ohh really, I play poker too."  He told me he knew many dealers that worked at various casinos around Vegas. We had a friendly chat about poker and I told him I will be playing at the Venetian mostly. "Ohh,  then say hello to my friend Bobby that works there as a dealer." I said I would do that if I saw him. (Obviously, Bobby is a name I gave the dealer for this blog, not the real name). Just as he let me through to pick up my luggage, the 400 tourists from the cattle class showed up to wreak havoc just like last time. The only difference now was that I was already through immigration. I got my luggage immediately as it had a “priority” tag on it. Customs gave me no problems and I was out of the terminal in record speed. I took a shuttle bus down to the domestic terminal where I had to wait for FM this time. We did not book a rental car this time as we were staying at the LINQ, and it’s just a short walk down to the Venetian. What’s even better, it’s just a few hundred meters away from In-N-Out Burger!!

This time we just checked in, took a shower and headed out for a burger as usual. We decided to do the same as last trip and kick it all off with an Aria tournament. However, this time we made it to the 1pm tournament as the DSE did not start until the day after. We played there a few hours with no success. When we entered the Aria poker room we saw that the US Poker Open had started just a few days later. We decided to drop by a few days later and see if we could spot some poker celebrities. More on that later.

I’m going to break it to you early. This was a trip filled with bad beats and bad luck. We must have used all the good poker mojo on the previous trip where we won two tournaments in a row. Anyhow, the rest of the first day we played some cash at the Mirage and at the Venetian.

The main event for this DSE was the $1,100 MSPT (Mid States Poker Tour) that had two starting flights. We definitely wanted to play in this one! There where daily satellites for this tournament and we played them all. Again, the bad beats were just stacking up. The story goes like this: All in and ahead… Then our opponent hit his two outer and draws out on us. Nonstop this went on until the day before the senior’s event. This was on a Thursday I believe. FM managed to win a ticket but could not play in Day 1 as he would play in the senior’s event that day. No problem, he was booked into Day 2. I played my last satellite (I thought) and the story repeats itself. Bad beat, bad beat, bad beat. Crap, I need to change poker rooms for a while. FM looked forward to playing his first seniors event. He was thinking. “This should be easy money to play with those nits”. Ohh boy, was he wrong. The game was hyper-aggressive. The older gentlemen were not afraid to put their chips into play. And in good old fashion of this trip he was all in and ahead only to be drawn out on.

I decided that enough is enough. I need to try something else. I checked out the PokerAtlas app on my phone and found out that they were running a $50k guarantee, two starting flights tournament at South Point Casino a bit south on the strip. I think the buyin was $250. I grabbed a taxi while FM was still waiting for the senior’s event to start. Once I sat down at the table at South Point, I quickly understood that this was a room filled mostly with regulars. I think I was the only one who did not know the name of all the dealers. Anyhow, the regs were all nice and the play got under way. I did not last long and was out during the third level. I texted FM and at that time he was also out of the senior event. We agreed to meet at the Aria poker room just to have a look. Once we got there the room was packed with action. All tables were full and a $10k PLO event was going on. There were cameras, lights, PokerGO and there was Daniel Negreanu sitting at the table right in front of us. He was chatting it up with the other players on his table as he usually is. What a nice guy that is! Just on another table, Justin Bonomo was sitting with his pink hair and a big stack. The more we looked around, the more poker celebs we spotted. Several of the big names of Poker After Dark were there as well. Wow, this was so cool. Up until now, we had only seen them play poker on TV. Now they were there just in front of us. We hung around for a while soaking up the atmosphere. We kept looking around for the Poker Brat, Mr. Phil Helmuth, but he was nowhere to be seen. Not sure he played any of those events at all.

We eventually grabbed a taxi back to Venetian and sat down and played some 1-2 cash. I noticed that they had added an extra last satellite to the program. FM already had a ticket, so he continued to play some cash, but I took yet another shot to win a ticket to the $1,100 MSPT the day after. This satellite was on temporary tables right outside of the poker room as the room was packed with MSPT Day 1 players, senior event players and another tournament currently going on. Not to mention all the cash action during these events. Before I busted out of the last satellite, FM had already called it a night and headed back home. I busted out long before any tickets were awarded as usual. I texted FM when I walked back home and told him my plan for tomorrow. Alright, I said. I could not let him play alone in the $1,100 MSPT tournament tomorrow. I will buy in I told him. He thought it was a good idea and I went to bed to get some sleep. When I met him in the reception area of the LINQ the day after he handed me $550. Why, I asked. We share all the wins he said, and he had technically won $1,100 for the ticket. What a nice gesture!  

On Saturday we played the second starting flight of the MSPT. Ohh, I forgot to say…first, we had another nutritious breakfast at a place I think you know by now. A massive field came along for the last starting flight. On Day 1A I think they got just under 400 entries. On Day 1B they got almost the double. First place prize money turned out to be just over $108k! I got a quiet table at the shielded area by the cashier counter. The starting stack of this tournament was 20k. As play kicked off I had a good feeling for the first time of this trip. I accumulated some chips and hit some flops. Once the ante kicked in there was a bust out and we got a new player. A fairly young guy, clearly experienced. He immediately said hello and started chatting up another guy on our table. It turned out the guy that was already on our table was one of the guys managing and commenting on live streams for the MSPT. However, on this day he was playing poker instead. It was impossible not to hear what they talked about, but the guy that works for MSPT kept talking of all the success of the new young guy that came to our table. He had won several MSPT’s before and had several big cashes in various tournaments in L.A.

Did anyone say Hyper LAG? The new player was definitely a LAG. Hyper LAG I would say. He opened 100% of the pots that were not already opened. I did not see him fold one single time if the pot was not opened. He did not open huge, but min raised all the time. In the beginning he was running over the table. Then I got involved in a hand with his buddy. I can’t remember all the details, but I flopped a gutshot. I made a continuation bet and got called. The turn put the second spade on the board. I fired another bet and I was called again. Damn…. Then the third spade hit on the river and I made a pot sized bet as a bluff. My opponent tanked for a while but eventually folded. After that, I decided that someone had to play back on our LAG. I started raising him in position with a wide range. I got folds most of the time and an occasional call. If he called, I fired a large bullet on the flop that ended the hand. This went on for a while and I kind of took away his revenue stream. He turned over to me and said. “Are you going to continue raising all my opens?” “Yep” I said. We both laughed a bit and I did just that.  

One nice hand came up a little later where the LAG opened, and I decided to just call this time. I held T9 suited in clubs. The flop came J-8-7, one club. Wow, what a flop! I c-bet just like I usually did and got a call. The turn brought a low card and I bet half the pot. I was quickly called again, and the pot was now of a decent size. The river brought the second club on the board and more straight possibilities in the eyes of my opponent. This time a threw out a single 5k chip and the LAG tanked for a while. He ended up calling and mucked in disgust once he saw my flopped straight. Sometime later he told me that he had pocket Aces. Those can be hard to lay down, I know all about that.

I continued to build my stack and had a real good feeling. Then I got a text from FM. He was back at his hotel room!! What? He had just busted out and taken his worst bad beat of this trip. He raised with pocket Queens and got 3-bet. He 4-bet and his opponent 5-bet all in. He called, and his opponent showed pocket 5’s! Alright, way ahead and the flop brought another Q and FM almost started to celebrate right there. Here is the catch. There were two diamonds on the board and one of his opponents 5’s was the 5 of diamond. Then the turn and river were runner runner diamonds!!!! He could not believe it. He flopped a set of Queens against a pair of 5’s and ended up busting to runner runner flush with a single 5 of diamonds. Poker can be a bitch some time. His exact words in the text message was: “Busted. Home licking my wounds”.

Ohh well. I continued to play and had a bit more than twice the average. This was just before the dinner break. I looked down at pocket Kings. The dreaded pocket Kings as we all know Rob calls them. The guy to my right opened the pot and I 3-bet. He 4-bet, I 5-bet and he pushed all in. Hmmm, could I be up against Aces I thought for a while. Antonio Esfandiari was in a similar situation against Tom Dwan in a recent Poker After Dark episode. (Check it out here. It did not end well for Antonio’s Kings that time. As I had most of my stack already invested, I felt I had to go for it. When I 5-bet I was hoping I was up against A-K. I pushed my stack in and sure, he flipped over pocket Aces!! Crap! We had more or less identical stacks. I started getting up and grabbing my backpack ready to leave. I stood behind my chair and saw a flop with all low cards appear. Should I have said “One time, I need my one time now”? Nhaaa, I don’t believe in that stuff. As lightning from a clear sky, a beautiful K appeared on the turn. I was fist pumping and suddenly my opponent was in disgust over seeing that King. I said to myself. “Rob… Those Kings are not so dreaded as you keep telling us they are." Then another player at the table told us that he folded an Ace preflop, so my opponent only had one out!! One single out, the last Ace in the deck. I was so sure I was going to get a double up and a very, very playable stack with a great chance of bagging chips for day 2. It felt like an eternity before the dealer dealt the river and I enjoyed every millisecond of it even though it took only a few seconds. And then……WHAMBOOOZA…… THE LAST ACE IN THE DECK HIT!!! I was floored. I could hardly stand. The whole table went “Whooooooooaaaaaaaa. That’s sick, dude”. Alright Rob, I should have listened to you after reading countless stories about the dreaded pocket Kings. 

Once the dust settled and the dealer was finished counting the chips I had less than one ante behind. I could do nothing but laugh of the whole situation. When I finally thought I had a chance after so many days with bad beats I was shot down with a bazooka. With my less than one ante left, I was all in before the automatic shuffler was even finished shuffling the cards. Once I got my cards I did not even look at them. Two guys ended up all in, so my chances were slim. I flipped over T8o. There was an 8 on the board, but the guys going all in had premium pocket pairs. I wished my table all the best for the rest of the tournament and sent a text to FM. He immediately called me and could not believe what he just read in my text. Actually, he was on the way to In-N-Out to buy me a burger for my dinner break as the breaks are quite short on the DSE. Ohh well, I slowly walked towards In-N-Out and sat down at a table with FM. We could do nothing than smile and shake our heads in disbelief. Did anyone say shake? Yes, the Chocolate shake at In-N-Out is the best shake in Vegas.

We started to walk relentlessly around not really knowing what to do next. We ended up at a cash table at Harrahs and immediately had the waiter bring us a Budweiser. Man, that Budweiser tasted good and worked like some kind of medicine for the bad beats we had that day. After a couple of more Bud’s we called it a day and went to sleep. We woke up a bit early on Sunday and decided to head downtown for the 11am Sunday tournament at the Golden Nugget. No more Venetian for this trip we said that morning. And get this, we did not have the nutritious breakfast at you know where that morning. Instead we had a couple of sizes of pizza in Fremont street instead. (The real reason we did not have an In-N-Out breakfast was actually because they had not yet opened when we woke up!)

We bought in to the $125 tournament and took our seats. I was immediately card dead and could not get any traction. I was shortly thereafter shot down in flames and busted out. No, I did not re-enter. Instead I grabbed a Bud light and watched FM battle it out. The hours went by and FM was in the money. Sweet. He ended up heads up with a nice lady and after some heads up play they decided to chop. They each got $1,500 and gave $100 to the dealer’s tip box. FM handed me $700 and we walked outside. It could be worse. We finally made some money that day. It was our last day in sin city for this trip.

Somehow, we ended up back at the Venetian just before 7pm. I tried hard, but I could not resist buying in on the last DSE event of the trip. The buy in was the regular $200 for the 7pm events. It was a roller coaster ride, but we managed to be on the right side of the coin flips enough times to last all the way to the bubble. As there were two tables, it was hand by hand. One grueling hour went by with hand by hand play and the blinds kept eating up my above average chip stacks. Finally, the bubble burst and we were both in the money again. FM busted out shortly thereafter and received the min cash of $393. I ended up with the same fate shortly after FM busted out and took the last of the min cash for a mighty $393. Ohh well, after a week of being brutally beaten up by the deck of cards, cashing sure felt like heaven! We went back to our hotel and packed our bags for an early departure the next day.

Once again I found myself in a brilliant business class seat of a 787 Dreamliner and started thinking…… Did it all change that last day of poker? Had our poker mojo returned? Did we finally see the light in the end of the bad beat tunnel? Do they have In-N-Out Burger in Bangkok? Very interesting questions indeed. I do not have an answer to those questions until our next poker trip is due. All I can tell you is they do NOT have In-N-Out burgers in Bangkok!

As it looks like right now, we are hoping to go to Vegas again during the WSOP this year. I can hardly wait!! In the meantime, I have to start looking around for a cheeseburger detox program.

Guest Post: Norwegians Invade Venetian (Part 1)

Allow me to introduce Eivind Brenne. A few days ago, Eivind messaged me on Facebook and told me he was a long time reader of my blog, and asked if I would be interested in publishing a guest post about his recent adventures in Vegas. He gave me a few details about his trips and I of course said yes.  When Eivind sent me his write-ups I was very impressed, and I present the first part below.  The second part, about a follow-up trip, will be presented in a couple of days.  Eivind always visits Vegas with his fellow Norwegian buddy FM.  Enjoy!

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First of all, thanks to Rob for letting us write a guest post for the best poker blog on this planet!  As we have a lot of ground to cover, this will end up as a two-part post covering two visits to the Venetian DeepStack Extravaganza (DSE).

Let’s start with some background data. We are two Norwegian guys who absolutely love poker. We also work together in the oil & gas industry, so this leaves us with some room to play poker between the work sessions offshore. We try to be in Vegas 2-3 times a year and lately we have grown into big fans of the DeepStack Extravaganza at the Venetian. I live in Bangkok where gambling is highly illegal, so Macau and Manilla are my close by choices for poker. My buddy, let’s call him FM, has a house up in Maine so he can hop on his Harley and drive down to some local poker rooms if he wants. However, nothing beats Las Vegas! There is something magical with this town. I can’t describe it. The feeling of coming up the escalators at McCarran Airport and seeing the huge “Welcome To Las Vegas” sign gives me goose bumps every time.

Before we kick off, let me throw out a few teasers of what we are going to cover in these posts: Two Venetian tournament wins, Heads up with a poker pro, the mother of all bad beats with the dreaded pocket Kings, DanielNegreanu, the $1,100 MSPT tournament and In-N-Out Burger.

The first trip took place in October last year during the October weekend DSE at the Venetian. I booked my trip with a Chinese airline that flew directly from Beijing to Las Vegas. I put all my money into my bankroll for this trip, so I decided to fly in cattle class. Not that bad actually, but once we got to Vegas I was almost the last person out of the airplane. On this day the customs and border control decided to check all passengers arriving from China. I immediately started to regret leaving the airplane as one of the last passengers. I ended up waiting 3 hours in customs queue. The problem was that most of the Chinese passenger did not speak a word of English and needed a Chinese interpreter. My buddy arrived at the same time but had to sit outside the rental car center for 3 grueling hours waiting for me. Once there we got our rental car. As we decided to use all our money for poker play, we had booked a midsize car from Hertz. It was cheap and not much of a car.

Oh, did I mention the car we had on a previous trip to Vegas? Those days were before the collapse in the oil & gas industry so we treated ourselves with a Ford Mustang GT500 booked from Hertz. Excited about the car, we came to the Hertz counter and the lady there asked us. “By the way, would you be interested in upgrading to the Ford Mustang Penske GT?” She shoved us a picture and it took us about 10 milliseconds to hand her our credit card and say YES, YES! Boy, what a monster that was. Specially tuned Mustang for Hertz only, 650 horse power with an automatic gear box. My buddy FM got the pleasure of driving it first. You could hear the car rev up from two floors down in the parking house. Driving out from the rental car center FM decided to see what it was good for and floored it as we were coming out of the first 90 degree turn from the rental car center towards the motor way. Holy crap!! We almost spun around, and white smoke could be seen in the rear mirror. We desperately fumbled around to find the traction control button and clicked it as soon as we found it. It stayed on for the reminder of that trip. See below for some pics of that beauty.

Let’s snap back to reality for this trip. We got the keys to our red Hyundai with a whopping 78 horse power. As we cruised down Las Vegas Boulevard with the windows open, all that was forgotten. We checked into our downtown hotel, grabbed a slice of pizza from one of the famous pizza shops on Fremont street and headed up the strip. As the DSE did not start until the day after we arrived, we decided to have a warmup session at Aria playing in the 7pm tournament. Nothing to report here. We busted out long before the money and called it a day.

Well rested we headed for the Venetian the day after. As soon as we handed the valet parking attendant our car keys and a couple of bucks, we headed over to In-N-Out Burger for a nutritious breakfast. A double cheese burger, cheese fries and a chocolate milkshake were what we needed before the poker marathon started that day. Back to the parking at the Venetian again…when I said we gave the valet parking attendant a few bucks, that was tips, not parking fee. The Venetian is right now almost the only casino that does not charge for parking.

First off was a $200 tournament at Noon. We played for about 5 hours and did not cash. Off again to In-N-Out Burger to reload some energy before the 7pm $200 bounty tournament. We sat down, and I had a fairly good run in the early levels. Once the antes kicked in our table broke and I was moved to a new table. Immediately I noticed a player there that was very competent in handling his chips and played solid poker. A bit later I found out that his girlfriend was sitting two seats to his left, and he was coaching her. She did play solid poker as well, and we soon found out she worked as a dealer and floor at another strip casino. Once I was moved to this table, I went card dead for a long time. The girlfriend of the good poker player seemed to build her stack slowly and was well above average stack. Down to about 15 bb, I looked down at a couple of ladies. It had been a raised in front of me, so I thought about it for some seconds and pushed all my chips in the middle. The girl I mentioned before went into the tank and started talking to herself about odds and that she was supposed to call with her hand. Eventually, she called and flipped over A-J off. My Queens held up and I was up to about 30 bb. After this I won some small pots and worked my stack up to about 35 bb when the following hand occurred. I was dealt A-Q suited and raised first in. The girl looked at me and re-raised me. I had seen her raise with a wide range before, so I decided to 4-bet. She thought about it for a while and pushed. At that point I was pot committed so it was an easy call. She had pocket 9's for a classic coin flip. Right there on the flop I hit my Ace and she did not improve. As she was packing her stuff and wishing her boyfriend good luck I stacked my chips and had nearly 80 bb in front of me. Time to play some serious poker! The final table came along, and the bubble busted. They paid 9 places and the top was $2.851. Each bounty was $50.

At this time, I had the second biggest stack on the table and opened up my range to take advantage of the smaller stacks. My buddy FM busted out before the money and was railing the final table together with the girlfriend of the good player. They started talking and FM shortly found out that the good player was indeed a very good player. Actually, it was not until later that we found out on the Hendon Mob that he had $7,9 mill in online earnings and $2,7 mill in live earnings. He had finished top 100 two time in the WSOP main event. His biggest cash was over $500k. He was truly a poker pro. However, he was a very nice guy and was not a complete maniac. Let’s call him NPP for Nice Poker Pro. At around 4am, I was heads up with NPP. I was thinking. “Crap, I knocked out his girlfriend earlier.” He was not interested in making a deal as he thought he could outplay me. He was probably right in believing so. I had a 4:1 chip advantage when we started heads up play. I was expecting NPP to really crack up the aggression, and indeed he did. I decided that the only way I could defeat him was to do the same. We were both playing very aggressively for about 30 min before I found out that he was very good in putting maximum pressure on me when he judged me as weak. I decided that I had to capitalize on that and decided to set a trap. A few orbits later I looked down at A-K off. I looked on my cards for a while pretending to be weak and casually threw out a call only. My trap had worked! NPP insta-pushed all in and I insta-called. When I insta-called NPP said something like, "Ohh, you got the goods?" I flipped over my A-K and he flipped over A-7 off. No one improved, and I took down the tournament with Ace high! As a gentleman that NPP was, he shook my hand and said, “well played sir.” I thanked him and said “likewise.”

My friend FM and I have a deal that we split all the winnings on our trips to Vegas to smooth out the variance of poker. I cashed out  a bit over $3k (Including some bounties) and gave $1.500 to FM. It was now 5am in the morning and we stopped by Carl's Jr. drive in before we headed to bed. I could not sleep for a while as adrenaline still rushed through my veins. We decided to skip the Noon tournament the day after and go straight for the 7pm $200 tournament again.

This one was a bit different as it was rebuy tournament. If you bust out you could rebuy for $100 for another full stack. You could also rebuy if you were at or below the starting stack of 12k chips. Obviously, I re-bought as soon as I sat down and had a good 24k stack to start play with. We quickly realized that it’s going to be fireworks around the tables with this kind of structure. Boy where we right. The maniacs kept playing even crazier than they usually did, and they rebought plenty of times. FM and I were kind of sitting back a bit playing it a little bit tight until the rebuy period finished. I think we made a good choice and we ended up chipping up a bit in the first 6 levels. Now after the rebuy ended play tightened up a bit but it was still quite crazy. I was moved to a new table and had one good hand quite early on. I turned quad 9’s and got some chips form my opponent. The guy I played with in that hand usually bet all streets, so I decided to check on the river. To my disappointment he checked back! I showed by quads and he patted his shoulder for not betting again on the river.

After my quads, I went insanely card dead. I was not playing a single hand for two hours. Just bleeding chips. One of the new guys at my table asked me why I did not play any hands. The guy sitting two to my left said jokingly “He only plays quads”. Then, an older gentleman to my right from Italy tangled with the big stack. Preflop there was a raise and a call by the Italian. The flop contained a deuce and there was some hefty betting going on. The turn brought the third flush card onboard, and straights were certainly possible. More betting took place and the river card put an open ended straight draw out there. His opponent pushed all in and the older gentleman tanked for quite some time. Eventually, he folded his cards face up. He had pocket deuces for a flopped set. At least, that was what he thought he had! Immediately after he folded his deuces face up another player at the table said: “Dude, you folded a boat!!” The Italian man went ballistic. He did not see that the board paired on the river. He was beating himself up badly and the table talked about nothing else for the next 30 min.

Later, the Italian man’s mistake turned out to be an advantage for me. First, I doubled up with a low pocket pair for a playable stack. Then I got it all in against the guy that took the Italian guy's chips. I had J-J and the other guy called with A-T. He did not improve, and I now had another decent stack. Sometime later I tangled again with the same guy. We ended up all in and I had A-K off. The other guy had A-Q suited. Nice, I said to myself. Our stacks were almost equal, and the winner of that pot would be the chip leader. Right there on the flop a Queen hit. Ouch… I started thinking that sure, I could not win two tournaments in a row. This was just the poker gods correcting the odds. I took it with a smile and started to get up. The turn brought a J and I now had a Broadway draw. Sure, I would not hit the 10 on the river I thought. The dealer dealt the river and BOOM. A beautiful 10 of clubs hit. I sucked out to take the chip lead. Ohh my budda, I started thinking. Could I really take down another tournament the day after the first win? I peeked at the screens and saw the first price was now $5,098 after they had counted and added the rebuys. FM was still in the game as well, with a decent stack. Shortly thereafter, the last two tables broke, and the final table was set. I was in Seat 9. A seat I quite like as I can relax my feet there. This tournament was played 9 handed. FM was in seat 6. He had a playable stack and was not yet in shove mode.  Some guys busted out and we were two away from the bubble. They paid 4 places today. The min cash was a decent $1,133. This was due to the inflated price pool from all the rebuys. A few orbits later I had added a bit to my stack as I again took advantage of my stack size and raised bigger preflop to steal the blinds and antes.

Then, a hand started that saw one guy knock out two players. Bingo! We were both in the money! A few hands later FM 3-bet a guy and got 4-bet. After some consideration he called. FM held J-T suited in hearts. The flop came 8h-9h-Jx. What a flop! FM now had the mighty open ended straight flush draw with top pair. FM was going nowhere with that monster draw and they ended up with all the chips in the middle. FM now had half the deck in outs with two more cards to come. His opponent tabled the dreaded pocket Kings. However, FM had to improve to win. Sadly, we all know the story. Everyone around the table said. “Too many outs man… Too many outs!” Indeed, it was. He did not improve and was all out. He cashed out $1,133 and again he was on the rail waiting for me. As a joke he came over and said. “Are you going to take it down again?” Sure thing I said with a laugh.

My opponent knocked out the third guy and that took us to heads up play. I was on cloud 9 and could not believe that I was sitting heads up again just 24 hours after my last heads up match. This time I felt a lot better. Loaded with experience from my last heads up play I started with a slight chip disadvantage. Not by much though. I felt I had the older gentlemen under control. Ok, let’s call him OG for older gentleman. OG was far from a nit, and knew he had to open most of the pots when heads up. I kept raising him a lot and slowly took a slight chip lead only by cranking up the aggression. From earlier I saw that OG pushed with medium cards some time. Then I look down at a beautiful hand. It was A-K suited in diamonds. Sweet I thought. I raised to 3x and OG only called. The flop came all low cards with one diamond. Immediately, OG announced “All in”. Wow I said. There were no real draws on the flop and he did it so fast I smelled a bluff. I went into the tank for a while and started looking at him. OG was like a statue. He did not want to make eye contact, so I started talking myself into calling as I was more and more sure he was bluffing. I did have two overcards and backdoor equity to improve with two more cards to come. I closed my eyes and threw in a 5k chip and announced “Call.” He flipped over his cards. Q-J offsuit! I could not believe I was actually ahead on the flop. The dealer dealt the turn…Brick….Then he looked at our cards and prepared the river. Another brick! Whohoo. Again, I had won my second tournament with Ace high. OG looked at the board and looked at the dealer and said. “So that’s it then?” Yep said the dealer, that’s it. OG was far from unhappy as he cashed out $3k. FM came over to me and we simply could not believe that exactly 24.5 hours after I beat NPP heads I had done it again. FM handed me his $1k payout and I went to the cage to cash out my $5k. I was $102 below the limit where they would withhold tax and I had to fill in all sorts of paperwork. This is because they deduct the $200 buy in from the $5k tax limit.

With my pockets full of cash, we went to pick up our red Hyundai that was in the valet parking. Again, we had no other choice than to stop at Carl's Jr for a burger on the way home. When we were waiting for our burgers, I handed FM a tad over $3k back for 50% of the profit we had that day. As it turned out, the Carl's Jr. attendant had messed up our orders and gave us two lousy hot dogs instead. I did not notice that until I came back in my room and opened the box. Well, with a big smile on my face, I ate my hotdog and enjoyed yet another sunrise over Las Vegas Blvd.

After the burger… Ehh, I mean hotdog, I was lying awake and could not sleep. Finally, I got some sleep and we came in very late to Venetian the day after. That was it. We played in DSE events for the next 5 days but did not cash or final table anything else. We had lots of fun playing some cash games around the strip and continued to enjoy our In-N-Out burgers.

That’s it for part 1. Part 2 has some nasty bad beats, Daniel Negreanu, the dreaded pocket kings, the $1,100 Mid states poker tour, and you probably guessed it…. even more In-N-Out burgers!

Stay tuned….

Part 2 has now been posted and can be found here.

Finding Royalty at the Venetian

Special Guest Post by @AvoidOddLaw

“A simple ‘hello’ could lead to a million things.” – Unknown

I just met Rob in person, for the first time, a couple days ago. I have been a long time, avid reader of his blog and aficionado of the pictures he posted. We have corresponded through Twitter many times, so when I told him I was going to be in Vegas the weekend before Halloween, he readily agreed to meet.  It was a quick meet-and-greet, as he and I were playing in the Aria tournament for that day. Not much to report since we both busted it half-way through. However, the plan was to try to get together for a game before I flew out of town.

I texted him that I was about to play in the Venetian noon tournament and that if I busted early would like to try to meet again.  Coincidently, he was on his way there himself to play as well. So while we were never at the same table, we updated each other during breaks on our progress (or lack of).

Also to my delight, Rob introduced me to the famous (or “infamous” as Lightning would say) Alysia Chang.  I was always curious to see if she would live up to her reputation of being a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Unfortunately, we never sat at the same table either so I couldn’t witness the whirling dervish in action myself. But Pepé Le Pew next to her sure did (check her tweets to fully understand)!

When Rob asked if I would be interested in writing about my escapades in this tournament, I was actually a bit apprehensive. I wasn't sure I could live up to his ability to paint a picture.  And compared to me, Rob tells tales in brevity (keep reading and you will see I am not joking). And now, without further ado, here’s my adventure with the $340 Venetian DoubleStack $25K GTD:

“Do not be distracted by the beautiful celebrities…” – Zoolander

I knew I should be focused on the game in front of me instead of the last few minutes of the Razorbacks - Ole Miss game.  I aspire to be more like Phil Ivey and pierce my opponent’s soul with an unwavering stare. I wanted to watch their every move, looking for the signs that give away the strength of their hands.  But alas, at that moment, I was just another recreational player with the attention span of a goldfish.  And like a teenage boy in the prime of his puberty, I was easily swayed when the attractive Samantha Abernathy sat down across the felt from me.  She is easily recognizable and although I am old enough to be her father, young uncle, I could not help but admire her beauty.

At that moment, my wife’s radar must have been working overtime from 1,300 miles away and it was as if she called the floor herself because within a few minutes of Samantha’s arrival, I felt a tap on my shoulder.  Looming over me was a floor person with a rack in his hand.  With a sigh I took the rack, put my tongue back in, and followed him begrudgingly to another table. And to punish my transgression of the eyes further, I was seated facing away from my original table.  My only consolation was the Penn State – Ohio State game was just starting on the TV.

“Life is like a ten speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use.” –Charles M. Schulz

I started off slow, playing very passively.  So passive, you would have thought I was hiding from the monsters under the bed or skeletons in the closet.  I was in the small blind with AK after it was limped 3-ways to me.  With the intent to punish the limpers and to exert my dominance over the game, while not wanting to play out of position, I reached for chips and…called.  WTF?!!

To be honest, I really don’t know why I did that at the time. But the big blind offered me redemption and raised the pot for me. There was only one caller when it got back to me. Now was my chance to spring the trap that I unknowingly set, so I grabbed more chips and…called again. OH HELL NO?!!

Who was this passive fish that looked a lot like me?  At least the board was a King high flop. I checked, he bet, the other player folded, and I called. Turn, I checked, he bet, I called. River, I checked, he bet, I called. Do you sense a pattern forming here?  He showed a better played AK and we chopped the pot with my lifeless, timid, amateurish style of play in full view of everyone at the table (and probably the next table over too).

I wish I could say that was the only passive play I had in my arsenal but it seems like I would stay in first gear until break.  At least I ended only down to 20k from my starting stack of 24k.

“I guess it comes down to a simple choice: Get busy living, or get busy dying” – The Shawshank Redemption

During break I finally located the cojones that I lost and came back to the table determined that it was time to get busy playing.  The table I was at had an eclectic group of players ranging from your soft rec player (myself included), all the way up to the tough semi-pro player, and everything in between.  One such player was more focused on the football games and monitoring his sports betting than playing poker.  However, when he did enter a hand, he would bet 7x – 10x the blinds and then bomb the flop with 2x – 3x pot size bets. Unfortunately I never found myself in a situation to take advantage of his bet sizing.  Instead, I went after an easier target: The semi-pro.

At least, I thought he behaved like a semi-pro with his consistent bet sizing and aggressive action when needed.  He showed knowledge of when to throttle back at times and he was building his stack with very little show-downs.  So in one hand, when he raised from middle position, I decided to call from the button with AsTx.

The flop was Ks6x3x. He c-bet as expected and I decided to float. The turn was a Qs.  He checked to me and not liking that either the K or Q could be in his range I opted to see a free card. The river was 9s and he lead out with a small value looking bet. I picked this moment to make a move.

Because of my limp fish image, I felt this was the right time to bluff him off his hand.  I had blockers to the nut flush, to a straight, and to AK/AQ.  So I chambered the revolver and pulled the trigger. I just wasn’t sure if I had the barrel pointed in the right direction.

He tanked for an eternity (at least he didn’t snap call). And when I was starting to think this may work… he made the hero call with QxTs. *Bam!*

“A mighty flame followeth a tiny spark.” – Dante Alighieri

Needless to say, I was starting to feel frustrated and a bit down on how awful a start I was having in this tournament.  And it was entirely my fault. But the reason I picked this tourney was because of its deep stacks and structure. I can make mistakes and still have plenty of time to recover. And the best way to recover from a rough start is to find the spark that lights my heater.

The semi-pro raised to 1.5k from early position and it was called by another player before it came to me. I looked down and found the silver bullets, AA. At this time I was down to 17k with blinds at 300/600/75. I re-raised him to 5k.

He stared at me (and my stack) and after a quick glanced at the player between us he said those magical words, “All-in”. The other player snapped folded and I quickly tossed in a chip and turned over my cards. He shook his head and showed AK. The board ran out and I got my first double-up with the added benefit of putting a big dent into his well-earned stack.

And with that, the furnace kicked on full blast. I called a preflop raise with AJ and flopped AAx. I checked to the preflop raiser, she bet, I called. Turn was A. I check, she checked. River blank and I set the lure and checked. She took the bait and bet. I raised and she folded asking if I had quads. I don’t usually show and just shook my head not wanting to give the table any free information.

There was a raise and a call in front of me when I called with QsJs. Flop was AsKs9x. Bet, call, call. Turn was a 6. Bet and then a raise. I saw that the initial bettor had already cut out chips for a call.  I made the call and he did call as expected. The river was the most beautiful card in the deck. No, Norman Chad it couldn’t be the Ace of Spades (that was already on the flop).  To me the most beautiful card is the Ten of Spades!  Holy Royal Flush Batman!!!

First player checked and second player bet.  Again, the first player gave off a tell, and this time he was telling me he was going to fold so I raised. He folded as expected and the second player…folded (Damn!). This one I had to show. Unfortunately, I was so deeply enthralled with the beauty of it that it was only later I realized I didn’t snap a picture of it. My stack was now at 69.8k with blinds 400/800/100.

I had AcKc in the cutoff and re-raised a middle position raiser, he called. Flop KsQcQs, he led into me and I called. Turn 9c. He bet again and I shoved. He tanked and I was worried that I overplayed my hand when he eventually found a call.  He showed AhKh and I was free-rolling. He shouted no clubs and on the river came the second most beautiful card in the deck Norman, the Jc! My stack was now at 120k with blinds at 600/1200/200. I was on fire!

“I’m on a roller coaster that only goes up, my friend.” - The Fault in Our Stars

The nice thing about having a deep stack in a good structure like this tournament is that now I could play the game I should have done at the very beginning. The heater got my juices flowing.  I picked my spots, being aggressive when in a hand, and maximizing pressure on the other players. I finally found my stride. I played good poker and try to avoid the minefields.  At first, my roller coaster kept climbing the hill.

• ·       At 142k. Blinds 600/1200/200. 71 left.
• ·       At 154k. Blinds 800/1600/200. 58 left.
• ·       At 175k. Blinds 1.2k/2.4k/400. 39 left.

And I found the peak when I had pocket 6’s and busted a player with a flopped set against his overpair. 

• ·       At 250k. Blinds 1.5k/3k/500. 38 left.

 “I didn’t come this far, to only come this far.” – Unknown

But eventually, like all good rides, it descended into a death spiral!  The very next hand I get my AA shoved on by KK just to watch them get cracked with a Turn K.

• ·       At 194k. Blinds 1.5k/3k/500. 37 left.

And it showed no signs of slowing down.  My KK lost to AQ followed by A9 losing to KQ.

• ·       At 130k. Blinds 2k/4k/500. 30 left.

Determined to fight like a cornered badger, I pulled off a bluff with A5 on the button against a player that really didn’t want to fold at first.

• ·       At 176k. Blinds 3k/6k/1k. 27 left.

After giving up some chips on a river shove that I couldn’t call, I found JJ.  Yes, the hand that most recs hate! Young hooded player with ear buds, 3-bet my raise and I decided to play back at him with a 4-bet. Don’t try this at home kids! He eventually found a fold, not willing to commit his stack yet.

• ·       At 210k. Blinds 3k/6k/1k. 27 left.

And when it looked like I was starting back in the right direction, I got blind-sided. Short stack went all in with QT and I called with AA. Board ran out AKJxx.

• ·       At 110k. Blinds 4k/8k/1k. 22 left.

 It was hard to fathom that with only 4 spots away from the bubble that I could be out soon.  I didn’t want to end it like this. The final countdown began:

21 left.

20 left.

19 left.

We went to hand-for-hand. A proposal was made to pay the bubble to speed it up but a couple of the other players shot it down. Each hand played was torturous, like a slow drip down on the forehead.  I was able to get a couple of walks and even stole a blind or two to stay alive. Eventually the bubble burst.

“Everything is negotiable. Whether or not the negotiation is easy is another thing.” –Carrie Fisher

18 left.

17 left.

I was sitting on a stack of 140k with blinds at 6k/12k/2k.  The even chop value was $2,452 which was equivalent to between 5^th and 6^th place.  It was proposed to do an even chop by several players at my table.  I doubted that 17 players would agree.  Nevertheless, they voted on it using red cards for “Yes” and black cards for “No”. 

Our table was all red; the other table had a couple black cards.  No surprise there so play continued. I already accepted my fate that I was on borrowed time and was hoping the poker gods would give me their blessing.

I guess they granted me a partial wish because somehow I managed to win just enough to stay afloat.  Players were dropping like flies:

16 left.

15 left.

14 left.

13 left.

12 left.

I was the shortest stack (106k with blinds 8k/16k/2k) when a new chop was proposed.  This time instead of an even chop, it was suggested to do a chip chop. Someone else suggested an ICM chop but Venetian shot that down. After some discussions, eventually everyone agreed to stop the clock and see what would be the payouts. 

It took the floor some time to count everyone chips, enter it into a spreadsheet, double/triple check the numbers before they told us the amounts.  I already decided that if it wasn’t much more than 12^th place money I would be voting it down since I had nothing to lose.

But when they told me as shortest stack I would receive $1,645, which was equivalent to 7^th place money and doubled what I could get for finishing 12^th, I readily agreed.  Fortunately, everyone else also agreed.  We all shook hands and congratulated each other like we won the World Series (mainly because I think we were all exhausted and relieved it was finally over). 

“All good things must come to an end” – Geoffrey Chaucer

The tournament started at noon and by the time I was out of there, it was almost 2 am. Exhausted but thrilled to cash after a hard fought day, I made my way back to the hotel and crashed. This was the icing on the cake as I had a great Vegas trip and much needed break from reality.  Maybe one day I will tell you about the overall trip and how I got assaulted by a female cop (dressed like the picture shown here).  ;)

About the Author:

My Twitter profile (@AvoidOddLaw) basically describes me in a nutshell:  “Weekend Recreational Poker Player, Weekday Senior Business Analyst, and Everyday Husband & Dad.” I play for the fun and the challenge of it. While I always wanted to become a great poker player, reality dictates otherwise. One day I hope I can elevate my game but until then, I just play the small cash tables and tournaments.